It's Loverly

read this

2012-01-05T07:42:00.000-05:00

Megan Amram's Tumblr is probably the funniest thing on the World Wide Web. Recommended if you like laughing.

Cheers

2012-01-03T09:39:00.000-05:00

Time to ponder our intentions for the rising year.

circumstances & blessings

2011-11-22T13:37:00.001-05:00

The expectation was that right now I'd be a full-time working mom. Back in January, when we were 6-months pregnant, we lined up full-time childcare at a center with a wonderful reputation, that happens to be just up the street. I prepared to be a working mom, knowing it would be hard but hoping that someday we could afford for one of us to work less and be home with our kids more. But I was happy with the path my career was on, comfortable with working in order to provide our family with more opportunities, and planned to continue on that road.

And then, well, in this economy I guess our story isn't so uncommon.

I returned from maternity leave in June- the plan was that I would ease back in to the "working mom" routine with a month of part time work before resuming my full time schedule. Going back was hard, but the small company I work for had been flexible and supportive of my leave plans, and I was looking forward to reconnecting with the career part of my life and picking up where I left off.

Instead, I am still working that part-time schedule, and after months hoping that my hours would increase, I have accepted that they will not.

So, I go to work for 15 hours a week and I am home with Evelyn three days a week. This part of the situation has been an absolute gift. I treasure our days together and I am beyond grateful that I've been able to witness the magic of the day to day changes in her over these eight months. I had no idea being home with my baby could be so fulfilling, and make me so happy (or that it could be so challenging and exhausting!)

The flip-side is the large (and completely unplanned) cut in income, and figuring out how to maintain this life built on two full incomes. Certainly, it could be worse- there are plenty of people who have been hit harder. But still, it's been a challenge. We've learned to live on less: I plan inexpensive but healthy meals, we shop thrift and consignment stores when we really need something, we've curbed our take-out habits, we live more simply. It's not all bad, and we've learned that this lifestyle is more doable than we first thought. The tougher-to-swallow part is back-burnering plans for home upgrades that we had planned, putting travel on hold, and worries about how we'll manage if we are faced with a large unplanned expense.

So I continue to look for ways to increase our income- picking up some editing and copywriting gigs, finding little ways to bring in money here and there. I've had to adjust how I define myself, with a career that had been the focus of much of my days until March suddenly playing a much smaller role. As wonderful as it is, it has taken me time to figure out how to be a work-at-home mom on those three days and to value the importance of that work. And holy moly, I have so much respect for full-time work-at-home moms. It is not an easy gig- babies are demanding bosses!

I know that this is temporary. Soon I will be working more, the financial squeeze will ease up, we'll be in a place where we can again dream of family vacations and kitchen renovations. Knowing that makes me savor each day I am home with Evelyn. I try to memorize every moment, the way she is at each stage, the rhythms of our days. I think about how to balance the wonderfulness of this home life with a work life that provides what we need, and what she needs. I know this will be the struggle, that we will always be recalibrating, finding balance, and redefining what everyone needs as our family changes.

Evelyn’s Birth Story

2011-09-26T22:42:00.002-04:00

In honor of Evelyn's six-month birthday: the story of her birth. I wasn't originally planning to share this, but I've found it so helpful to read others' experiences since beginning this journey - maybe someone will find the story of our Cesarean birth helpful or reassuring.

I wanted a natural birth, and I was ready for it. Patrick and I prepared with months of Hypnobirth classes, I took prenatal yoga and strength classes to prepare my body, and every time I envisioned our birth it was natural and calm and all about this amazing thing my body would do to bring our baby into the world, with Patrick keeping me steady all the way through.

Our first parenting lesson was in letting go of plans and expectations.

March 20, 2011

All along, our baby was head up: ready to take on the world, facing forward right along with me. By the time I reached 35 weeks, I knew that the baby had to flip or we’d be facing a certain Cesarean birth. We did everything we could to get the baby to turn: SpinningBabies.com became my handbook, I did inversions all the time (laying upside down, kneeling on the couch with my head on a pillow on the floor), laying on the floor with my hips propped up while Patrick played music and shined light at the bottom of my belly, we even worked with Johanna, our Hypnobirth teacher and doula, on visualizations and meditations to get the baby to turn. Johanna was amazing in her willingness to help us encourage the baby to turn-- we would Skype and she would talk us through the breech visualization, she recorded a visualization script for me to listen to on my own, and she checked in with us all the time.

The week leading up to Evelyn’s birthday, we were busy. We went to the All Over Albany birthday party at The Point. We bought flowers at the Lark Street Flower Market- Pat bought me a small bouquet of beautiful yellow ranunculus. We had a birthday dinner with Patrick’s grandmother- Chinese food at her house with some family and lots of talk about the baby. We went to the police station to have the baby's car seat installed. We decided it would be our last busy week, and that for the two weeks (or however long it was) prior to our April 11 due date, we would take it easy and focus on resting up and preparing for the baby’s arrival.

On Friday March 25, we had a doctor’s appointment. I was having weekly appointments at that point, and since baby was still breech, ultrasounds at each appointment. I hadn’t felt the baby flip, but I was hopeful that maybe just maybe it had turned in the night and the bump that I thought to be the head was the rump. Alas, the ultrasound that Friday revealed that our stubborn little baby was still head up, butt down. After the ultrasound, we went in to see the doctor. She walked in, greeted us, and said “I think we have to deliver.” Patrick and I were both stunned. Now? What? Why? I was not quite at 38 weeks, and I had no intentions of intervening in the natural process unless absolutely necessary. Certainly not before 40 weeks. And here was this statement that threw all of that out the window.

There were concerns that the baby was small, that my fluid was low, that the baby was still in a breech position. “You’re full term, and there are more risks than benefits to waiting.” The doctor said. We asked about trying an external version, where a doctor manipulates the belly and baby from the outside to get the baby to turn. It’s a possibility, she said, but carries risks and often ends up in a Cesarean delivery at that point anyway. We asked about what would happen if we just waited and didn’t take action, leaving the timing up to the baby and my body. Very close monitoring: appointments, ultrasounds, and non-stress tests a few times a week, she told us. She reminded us of what she saw as the risks and told us that she strongly recommended a Cesearean delivery be scheduled for early the next week.

We asked if we could have the weekend to think about it, and she agreed, as long as we scheduled an appointment for Monday. We did that, and left the office feeling defeated. Months of preparing and vowing to follow my body and the baby, and here we were: being encouraged to schedule a Cesarean birth. This is not what we had envisioned and it felt as though it was all out of our control. I knew there was a lot to be thankful for: the baby and I were healthy. I’d carried the baby to term and had a very healthy and pleasant pregnancy. I tried to remind myself of all these things, but the feelings of failure were already creeping in.

We each went to work consumed by the ‘what ifs’ and ‘what nows’. I tried to put it out of my head until the evening. My co-workers threw me a little shower and ordered Indian food. There was a Baby Pool to guess the date the baby would be born and whether it would be a boy or a girl. One of my colleagues joked that I’d be going into labor over the weekend. I told him no way, that’s crazy, I hadn’t had a single sign that labor was anywhere close to happening. He swore, yep, soon. No way, I said, I’ll see you Monday. (Perhaps one of the only signs I had of impending labor was the deep cleaning and organizing I gave my desk that afternoon).

Pat and I spent the evening discussing our situation with each other, our parents, and our friends, and finally decided to put it away for the night and sleep on it. We ordered Thai food and watched TV. Our cat Calvin stared at my belly, which we thought was funny enough to take a photo of. My computer froze up and I decided I’d deal with that in the morning. We went to bed too late.

At 4:00 a.m. I was awakened by what felt like a strong kick from our little one. I got up to use the bathroom, and was greeted with a gush that just kept gushing. I had a moment of fear - the sudden realization that my water had broken. I walked back to the bed, turned the light on, tried to see if there was wetness in the bed. Pat sat up, asked what was going on. “I think my water just broke.”
“Ok, alright, are you ok? Do you need anything? We need to call the doctor.” (We had been told that since the baby was breech, we needed to call the doctor right away if I went into labor.)

We called the doctor, and I spoke with her. She asked if I wanted to stay home for awhile. I said yes, but reminded her the baby was breech. Oh, yes, she said- well then, you need to get to the hospital.

Everything was surreal. There was the vision we had for this moment: that at this point we’d be preparing to labor at home for as long as possible. And the reality that we had: we were going to the hospital right away. The doctor asked if I’d eaten anything, I said no, we hung up.

We packed our things (I had started gathering the hospital bag earlier in the week, but wasn't fully ready). I accepted that we wouldn’t need all of the things we had planned to bring for labor- the yoga ball, tennis balls for massaging my back, the hypnobirth CD and signage. Packing our baby’s teeny going home outfit and my nursing gown reminded me that in the end, we were having this baby. I was flooded with excitement and nerves that gave way to calm- a feeling that whatever happened, we were ready and eager to meet our babe.

I was hungry and ate a banana. It was 4:40 am and we headed to the hospital with a suitcase and a carseat.

We live a few blocks from the hospital, and I remember the feeling of that short drive. The world was silent and still. Spring was arriving and the air had a new warmth to it. It felt like we were the only ones in the world awake, quietly on our way to have a life changing experience.

We walked through the (under construction) hospital toward the Labor & Delivery floor, just like we’d practiced on our tour a few weeks earlier. I was beginning to feel contractions. We stood together waiting for the elevator, looked at one another, Pat commented on how huge this moment was. Everything was about to change. We took a few deep breaths, kissed, the moment crystallized.

Once we were checked in, we were given a room where I changed into a gown and climbed into bed. They verified that my water had indeed broken, and an ultrasound was done to verify that yes, baby was still head up. My doctor wasn’t on call- in fact, no one from my OB’s office was- and we met the OB on call that night. He was kind and explained what needed to happen. He had spoken to our doctor and knew that we had been hoping to avoid a Cesarean. He told us exactly what would happen, made certain we knew and understood that at this point, a Cesarean was the only option. My contractions became more intense.

We met the anesthesiologist, who seemed to still be waking up (har har) when he stumbled into our room. He described the process for administering the spinal anesthesia, which I would receive just minutes before the baby was delivered. I asked again if Patrick could be with me when they did the spinal. He said no, because (honestly, this was his story), one time a dad came in during the spinal, passed out, hit his head, and died. I wasn't sure what to think of this guy.

When the doctors all found out I’d eaten a banana, they weren’t thrilled. In order to be given the spinal for the Cesarean, you aren’t supposed to have eaten for 8 hours. Because of that banana, they’d be delaying the delivery.

Secretly, I was very pleased. I didn’t know the banana would play any role at all in this birth story, but it turned out to be central. The banana meant that I would experience labor. I would feel the contractions as my baby prepared to meet the world. The baby would have a few hours of getting those labor hormones. Thank you, banana!

We settled into the bed, Pat put movies on the laptop, my contractions grew more intense. The doctor had said that if they grew so intense that I couldn’t speak, they’d prep me for delivery, regardless of the time.

I labored until 11 am, at which point contractions were fairly intense and coming just a couple minutes apart. I used the Hypnobirth relaxation methods to stay relaxed and focused as each wave came over me. Patrick did light-touch massage on my arm and played our favorite music. I am grateful for those hours.

I was given IV fluids along with some anti-nausea medication to ease my recovery from surgery. When the decision was made that labor was progressing and it was time to deliver the baby, things moved fast. The doctors and nurses were in the room. Patrick suited up in scrubs. I was shaved and prepped and wheeled down the hall, where I was brought into the operating room. Those were the worst few minutes of the whole ordeal. The room was bright and cold. Patrick wasn’t allowed to come in while the spinal was administered. An inexperienced nursing student held my arms while the anesthesiologist gave me the injection in my lower back. A deep pinch while held by unsteady arms. The rush to lay me down after the anesthesia was delivered. The curtain raised between my chest and the lower part of my body.
And then, Patrick was there. And then, peace. He was there, with me, our eyes locked the entire time. All was full of love, even in this cold setting.

The anesthesiologist who seemed bumbling won my heart when he requested the chatter among the doctors and nurses quiet down, reminded them that this was a birth. He stayed with me as well, reassuring, making sure I was okay, talking both Patrick and I through what was happening.

We had requested that Pat announce the baby’s sex (we maintained parts of our birth plan as much as we could). I was told I’d feel pressure and pulling when they delivered the baby. It was all happening. Nothing like I imagined, but our baby was almost here.

And then, there it was- some pressure. The doctor telling Patrick to stand and look over the curtain as our baby was born.

My husband’s voice announcing that we had a daughter. Her strong strong cry.
My heart swelling and swelling. All was right in the world. It was all right.

Patrick went to be with her as they cleaned her. He snapped photos of her first moments. I craned my head to see behind me, my daughter. Glimpsing her face, her hands, her feet. Hearing her cries. Oh my God, I kept repeating. Oh my God. Crying tears of joy and release. Our baby was here. She was here.

She was cleaned and wrapped and Patrick brought her over to me. I saw her gorgeous face up close, said hello. That beautiful face. The tears would not stop streaming down my face- tears of joy like I’ve never cried before. We had a daughter. Amazing.

Born at 11:37 a.m. on March 26, 6 pounds, 4 oz. Her birth stats say that she was 20.5 inches, but at the pediatrician’s a few days later she was 19 inches, so I’m guessing someone's measurements were off in those first minutes.

Patrick went with her to the recovery room while I was sewn up, and then I was wheeled over to join them. She was put on my chest - so tiny and perfect. She nursed. We had skin to skin time. Pat and I studied her features. Marveled at her. The nurse took our first family photo.

We had our list of names, but nothing was decided- we planned to choose the name when we saw our baby. We had narrowed our girl’s names down to Eleanor and Evelyn. When we met her, we agreed easily that the name to give her was Evelyn. Evelyn Hart.

Evelyn, a family name on Patrick's side and one that we love the sound and feel of. Strong and beautiful. Hart after my great-grandmother, Madeline Hart, who was bold and intelligent, who gave me a love of books and demonstrated a bold spirit through and through. (The middle name came to me in the early weeks of my pregnany, sitting around the campfire at our family cabin that Madeline bought in the 1940s. That part of Evelyn's name was decided from the start.)

When they took Evelyn’s vitals a bit after birth (could it have been an hour?), her temperature was low and she needed to go to the nursery for some time under the heat lamp. Patrick went with her while I stayed in the recovery room (they wouldn’t let me move until I regained feeling in my legs- it was the strangest thing, not being able to feel my legs). We called our parents to share our joy. A girl! We have a girl.

Patrick came back in time to walk beside my bed as I was taken to our room in the brand new Mother-Baby area of the hospital. By this time, I was beginning to feel very nauseous. I was wheeled down the hall- very quickly- and began vomiting by the time we reached the room. I was sick for most of the afternoon, a reaction to the anesthesia. It was an awful feeling, wanting nothing more than to be with my baby, but to be so sick. Meanwhile, she was still in the nursery warming up. I just wanted to hold her. That part of the afternoon was tough, but I’m thankful it was brief, and that we weren’t separated for long.

I was feeling better by mid-afternoon, and Evelyn was released from the nursery and returned to us- warm and cozy. We had some time alone together - our new family of three. Evelyn was placed on my chest for more skin-to-skin time, Patrick held her, we took photos and, of course, marveled some more.

Meanwhile, we had all four new grandparents and a new uncle in the waiting room, where they’d been for hours. They'd been able to see her in the nursery, but were anxious to meet their grandbaby. When we were ready, the grandparents came in, two at a time, to meet and hold their granddaughter. Our room was filled with happiness and love, with our little Evy at the center of it all.

The day Evelyn was born was sunny and beautiful - early spring after a long and very snowy winter, a few days after the vernal equinox. March going out like a lamb. The light filtered into our room casting a warm glow. Evy was small but strong from the start: a good eater, hands that were always moving, a full head of hair.

Our birth was nothing like I imagined, nothing like we’d planned. After months of learning about why I didn’t want a Cesarean birth, it was hard coming to grips that we had no other options. I spent a lot of time fending off feelings of disappointment and failure that we didn’t have a natural birth, but of course the important thing is that I delivered a beautiful healthy baby. We were so blessed that there were no complications and that everyone was healthy. We never had to make the decision to have a scheduled Cesarean- after all our fretting, Evelyn chose her birthday.

I would never choose a Cesarean birth. While recovery was quicker than I imagined (I felt pretty good after a week, great after two), the first four days were full of soreness and limited mobility- and all I wanted to do was snuggle with that baby.

Having said that, I also want to say, for those facing a similar situation: A Cesarean birth is still a birth. You are still giving birth, and every birth is amazing. Don’t let that experience be lessened or taken away from you. So many women find themselves in this situation, a birth that wasn’t what they imagined, a feeling of having failed. Even if you are unable to push your baby out, due to positioning or complications or some other reason that is out of your control, you are bringing life into this world.

I didn't have the birth that I imagined. I didn’t push my baby out, she was lifted out into the world, and I have a small smile-shaped scar to remind me of her first moments. Evelyn came into this world head up, healthy, with a strong voice, a strong will, and surrounded by love. How can I be disappointed in that?

4

2011-07-25T22:54:00.003-04:00

Evelyn turns 4 months old tomorrow. Four months! The longest/shortest/hardest/happiest/funniest/weirdest/best four months I've ever lived through.

It's hard to write about motherhood and parenthood without repeating all the stuff that's already been said. Quick summary goes like this:

Not a lot of sleep was had for two months. But Mama hormones are amazing and it wasn't as bad as it sounds. Except for the nights that it was.
"Varsity Mom" friends - the ones who have been through it all - are awesome cheerleaders. Ask them for advice, and try their advice, even if you're skeptical. We survived the early days on the advice and support of awesome mom friends. .
Having family just minutes away has been great. I miss the places we used to live very much, but the support network we have here is invaluable (and has given us freedom and peace of mind we may not have had elsewhere).
I had no idea I would love being a mom so much. So so much.
I had no idea the first few weeks would be so difficult, or that I'd cry so much for so many reasons, good and bad (hormones + new baby + cesarean birth recovery = whoa).
I knew having the right partner would be important- it has been, on every single matter. Patrick is a fantastic Dad and co-parent. We have a rhythm to how we parent, which I'm sure we'll always be adjusting, but we have each other's backs all the time. It makes all the difference.
Breastfeeding. In the beginning, harder than I ever imagined. To be honest, I didn't think a lot about it before she was here- we attended a class, I knew it was something I wanted to do, just assumed it would be something that just happened. The first weeks were hard, and some feedings still are. Sometimes it hurts (even if they say it shouldn't, it does). Having the right support network is so so crucial (see the theme here?). I'm very proud and grateful that we've made it to four months exclusively breastfeeding, and have no plans of stopping anytime soon.
Instincts are powerful. I have tried very hard to follow that gut feeling and trust my instincts on the parenting stuff. Gut checks are a daily (hourly?) occurance.
I also try to not worry too much or overthink or feel like I have to strictly adhere to one parenting philosophy. Over and over again this happens: We want to do something (eat at a restaurant, go to church, have a photoshoot, go to a music fest, take a car ride, go on a playdate, go to a dinner party, etc etc etc). We worry about Evy in said situation. We decide to try it. She does awesome. The lesson has been to prepare as much as possible and then just give it a go. If it doesn't work, bail, no biggie. So far, we've rarely had to bail.
My obsession with documentation has increase ten-fold. Photos galore, of course. And a Google document that I update a few times a week- a running letter to Evelyn, telling her about this time in her life and mine. It's a low-pressure way of keeping track of the day to day, these fleeting moments, when the present easily replaces memories of the way she was just weeks ago.
In the past few weeks, two separate people have commented on the peacefulness that they've noticed in me since I became a mom. I didn't know it was outwardly visible, but it's how I feel. To be able to slow down, to follow the lead of this person so new to life, to be able to eliminate all the external noise-- it's brought a calmness to my attitude and outlook, even at a time that can be anything but calm.
The love, oh the love. The love that makes my chest feel like it's bursting and being crushed. The love for her that has increased my love for everything else. The love that I knew would be huge but never could have begun to imagine. It is wonderful and utterly terrifying.

There's a lot to say here, and also not much that hasn't been said before. Most days, I still can't believe this is my life, and I'm full of gratitude that it is.

The Nursery

2011-05-06T09:53:00.002-04:00

The nursery, from start to finish (click through to the Flickr set for details) :

Essential Tools of New Parenthood

2011-04-28T14:22:00.003-04:00

One month in to this parenthood gig, here are the things we would not have survived without:

The Happiest Baby on the Block techniques. We were given both the DVD and the book, and the soothing techniques Dr. Karp teaches have been sanity-savers. We use the "Five S's" all of the time. Evy cannot sleep without being swaddled but her strong arms break free of most swaddles- the swaddling method Dr. Karp teaches is one of the few she has trouble breaking out of.
Swaddle Designs swaddling blankets - nice and big, and they last multiple uses without getting stretched out. A lot of people like the Aden & Anais blankets, but at least now while Evy is still tiny these just don't wrap tight enough. They stretch out after one or two uses and she is able to get those arms out. I do think they'll be more useful when she's a little bigger.
Carriers. I am officially a convert and a strong believer in baby wearing. We received an Ergo and infant insert as well as a Baby K'tan as a gift, and I just purchased a Sleepy Wrap (I totally understand how people end up with 20 different baby carriers....). It's amazing how being worn calms Evelyn down if she's fussy. Today has been a fussy day (she got a shot yesterday, so I blame that)- she's currently sleeping on me in the Sleepy Wrap. She prefers being held over all other options- I certainly don't mind the snuggle time, but it makes it hard to do anything else, including important things like eating. Putting her in a carrier makes her happy while letting me have my hands free. I've used all of the carriers around the house, and I've used the Ergo on walks. I can definitely see using all of them out and about.
My iPhone. For keeping track of nursing (I've been using the iBaby Feed app, which is great) and for keeping me entertained and connected to the outside world when the babe wants to nurse often and for an hour at a time (iBaby Feed tells me I've been spending an average of 7 hours per day nursing, oy). Especially helpful for keeping me company during those middle of the night feedings. I'm sure I'm ruining my already terrible eyesight even further.
Baby swing/bouncy seat- At least one of Evy's naps each day is in the swing, and she'll often hang out in there while we eat dinner. She likes the motion, and the built-in nature sounds help her fall asleep. Our swing (linked to) is also a bouncy seat- she'll hang out in that in the bathroom while I shower or upstairs when I have things to do in our room.
Sleep Sheep - A cute little white noise machine. We have the smaller travel sheep, I think the big one has more sounds. White noise is also part of the Happiest Baby on the Block methods, and it so works. Ocean sounds help Evy fall asleep each night (and since her bassinet is right next to our bed, they help her mama make the most of those few hours of sleep, too!) The swing also makes nature sounds, helpful for her naps.

With the help of the above-- and our very supportive families-- we've been doing really well. The first two weeks were extremely hard - I definitely cried along with Evy on more than one occasion. Things have steadily gotten better. There still isn't a lot of sleep in our lives, but we have a routine that lets both Pat and I make the most of the sleep we're able to get. We're getting to know her cries and her signals and how to meet her needs. I love being a mom, I love seeing Pat as a dad, and I am head over heels for Evelyn. Right now I'm just doing my best to enjoy every moment.

Baby C

2011-04-14T13:56:00.004-04:00

Evelyn Hart
March 26, 2011
6 pounds, 4 ounces
Totally awesome.

She picked her birthday afterall, 16 days early. At 4 am on 3/26 my water broke. I experienced 7 hours of labor (one of the things I was mourning in thinking about a planned cesarean birth). Despite all our efforts, she remained breech so was born via cesarean, but it was the best I could hope for- it was calm, Pat held my hand and stared into my eyes the entire time, he announced that we had a daughter, he was with her for her first minutes- the first to hold her, to bring her to me. These first weeks have been amazingly hard and amazingly awesome. I still can't believe we get to keep her.

She answers to Evelyn or Evy or Snugglebug or EvHart.

----
In other news: Photos of the finished nursery.
We also have a "friends and family only" Flickr group of Evelyn photos. Let me know if you don't have the link and would like it.

Planning the unplannable

2011-03-24T22:49:00.002-04:00

That's funny that I thought it made perfect sense to revitalize this blog while pregnant. Obviously that didn't go so well.

An update, at 37+ weeks: Baby is breech, butt down and head up. At least, he/she was a week ago. We've been doing what we can to help baby flip, and tomorrow we'll see how things look.

We've spent the past several months preparing for a natural birth- hypnobirth classes, lots of reading, practicing relaxation techniques, all of it. I've been really looking forward to the experience- no fear, just preparation and strength. And here we are, potentially facing an unavoidable c-section. I'm not yet accepting that as the final answer, but still: A lesson in not being able to control it all. I'm trying not to get caught up in it until we know for sure what's going on. Everyone is healthy, and whatever happens this little one will be in our arms very soon.

It's amazing how the parenting lessons begin so early!

Snow on snow on snow

2011-02-02T15:01:00.001-05:00

Learning As We Go

2011-01-31T17:51:00.004-05:00

Lately, a big part of my life involves learning and preparing.

Things I’ve been learning about lately:
(most learning has been alongside my partner in crime - having a learning buddy helps)

-Hypnobirthing. We’ve been taking a great class in this really logical approach to birth that focuses on relaxation and doing away with fear. I won’t go into the details here, but just ask me if you want to know more. It's fantastic.

-Bread baking. We've been working our way through the book Artisan Bread in 5 Minutes a Day. So far we've made loaves of bread (wheat, basic white, and peasant), pizza crust, and rolls. To be honest, the last several batches haven't been made by me, but the learning process has been a joint effort - and the rewards have been very tasty.

-Caring for an infant. I feel like I know nothing. The book Heading Home with Your Newborn has helped me to feel more prepared and more aware without too much of the panic-inducing stuff.

-Baby-led weaning- Patrick first heard about this in a story on NPR. Since then, one of the blogs I read (Cooking with My Kid) starting discussing it. Fascinating, and something we're seriously considering for the little one when he/she is ready.

-Cloth diapering - A dear friend of ours has cloth diapered her 8-month old most of his life and she did a ton of research leading up to it. She's been amazing at teaching us all about it, sharing resources, and helping us figure out what can be a very confusing world. I'm very excited about our decision to cloth diaper, and glad to have a great resource!

-Re-painting furniture- This was a divide-and-conquer effort at refreshing the dressers we got off Craigslist for the babe's room, but we both did our reading and YouTube-tutorial-watching beforehand. I sanded - by hand and then with the power sheet sander, which is awesome. Patrick primed and painted. I think we did pretty good.

And this is only the beginning!

Projects

2011-01-22T22:37:00.007-05:00

This is where we're headed with the baby's room. So far the walls are painted. We have the chair, which might be painted. We have the dresser (below), which will be painted a yellow similar to the dresser above. We may or may not have a crib. Window shades will be ordered this week. We've purchased and framed the submarine print (that giraffe!) We need to find a rug- looking for something not super expensive, ideally natural wool or cotton. Possibly gray, maybe brown or tan. Suggestions?

So, we have some projects to tackle. The goal is to have the room just-about-done by mid-March so that we can focus on the final preparations and enjoying some down time before the new member of our family arrives.

I'll keep you posted on our progress!

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Chair- Ikea Poang - ours currently has a black frame, contemplating painting it white
Crib skirt- Dwell Studio for Target- Hippo
Giraffe and Submarine prints - Threadless Artist Shoppe
Yellow dresser- Erin of Domestic Adventure (love their nursery!)
Wall color- Behr Tidepool
Dresser and nightstand (which will be a side table next to the chair) via Craigslist.

Be Afraid

2011-01-13T16:18:00.005-05:00

In the year leading up to our wedding, all of the emails and ads that came my way from the wedding industry seemed to be about how if I didn't spend money on this or this, my wedding wouldn't be the best day of my life. Worry! Or about how perfect I had to look. Stress! Or how much it should look like a magazine wedding. Or how far behind I was on the 600-item To Do list a website had created for me. Stress more!

In the months leading up to the birth of our baby, the emails and ads have either been about the millions of dangers to me and my baby lurking around every corner or about how awful everything is/will be. Topics of recent emails from baby industry websites include:

21 Pregnancy Symptoms You Shouldn't Ignore
Puffy Eyes
Swelling and Edema
Too Much Exercise
Your Aching Back
Not Gaining Enough Weight
Exercises to Avoid
Gaining Too Much
Getting Enough Exercise
Foods to Avoid
Exercise Don'ts

The message is clear: Experiencing a Big Life Moment? BE AFRAID OF EVERYTHING - what you're doing, what you're not doing, what will happen if you spend too much, what will happen if you don't spend enough, EVERYTHING. If you're not AFRAID, then at least be STRESSED.

revival

2011-01-12T18:58:00.005-05:00

My last post was 7 months ago. Inspired by a number of recent blog revivals I've noticed, I'm thinking about trying again.

There is snow snow snow outside and I'm 6 months pregnant with a long To Do list in front of me.

I'm going to revive this blog with the purpose of sharing projects (cooking/baking/house/etc), observations about life in Albany, and who knows- maybe a bit about impending motherhood, if I feel brave.

Over the past 6 months I've traveled to Michigan to visit my best friend and her new baby (twice), spent time in D.C. for work and fun, had many houseguests, completed a new patio (lots of help there), learned about gardening through planting my first vegetable and flower gardens, ran a few 5ks (including one when I was 10 weeks pregnant, ouch), spent time in Northampton, Lake George, Woodstock, and various other locales, ran a conference in Boston for 200+ businesswomen, took another yoga class, and, well, learned a lot about this whole having a baby thing.

So, let's try this again, shall we?

Letters worth reading

2010-06-14T22:05:00.004-04:00

The 20-something woman who writes this blog put out a call to women older than herself to write letters to their 20-something selves.

The results have been great (I'm always inspired by Maggie Mason- all of the letters are inspiring and comforting in their own ways.)

What would you say to your 20-something self? I'm in the midst of the last year of my 20s- my late 20s have been far different than my mid-20s, which were different than my early 20s (it's generally an upward trend- better and better). I've been thinking about the question and the letter- perhaps I'll have a share-able answer one day.

November 2001. I'm 20 and on top of the Eiffel Tower. Photo by Patrick.

List

2010-03-12T21:17:00.004-05:00

Things on my mind lately:

Household budgeting and sticking to it. We updated our budget and our efforts to be more aware of our finances. Being married and owning a house has changed the way we approach money- we've reassessed our savings goals, spending priorities, planning ahead, and looking at household finances as a whole rather than just who pays which bills.
Returning to my running routine and challenging myself to run longer races.
Upcoming house projects: Painting the blue room, cleaning up the yard, planning a new patio and gardens.
Springtime in Albany. I forgot how lovely it is, but these first few warm days have me remembering tulips and parks and sunny neighborhoods and sidewalk lunches.

Hearts

2010-02-12T11:20:00.003-05:00

Originally uploaded by nicolemperle

I'll get back to this blog one of these days, I really will.

In the meantime, happy Valentine's Day! It's always been one of my favorite holidays. After we moved into the house my parents' brought over (re: giddly dumped) some boxes of my old things, including some journals from elementary school. In first grade I wrote an entry about how Valentine's Day was my favorite holiday "because it's close to my birthday." My reasons for liking it are a slightly less self-centered these days- I like the cheeriness in the bleak winter, the chocolates (dark, please) and cupcakes, making valentines for my friends, the sweet sentiments, and the reminder to stop and appreciate the sweet things.
_________________

“Who knows how to make love stay?

Tell love you are going to the Junior's Deli on Flatbush Avenue in Brooklyn to pick up a cheesecake, and if love stays, it can have half. It will stay.

Tell love you want a memento of it and obtain a lock of its hair. Burn the hair in a dime-store incense burner with yin/yang symbols on three sides. Face southwest. Talk fast over the burning hair in a convincingly exotic language. Remove the ashes of the burnt hair and use them to paint a mustache on your face. Find love. Tell it you are someone new. It will stay.

Wake love up in the middle of the night. Tell it the world is on fire. Dash to the bedroom window and pee out of it. Casually return to bed and assure love that everything is going to be all right. Fall asleep. Love will be there in the morning.” - Tom Robbins

Making home: 1 month in

2009-12-20T20:32:00.007-05:00

As of tomorrow, we'll have lived in this home of our own for one full month. It's been a whirlwind of unpacking, visitors, a new job, setting up, cleaning, and getting reacquainted with this town.

We're at a point where we can cook meals in our kitchen and relax in our living room. Other rooms are still a work in progress: the office(s), the extra room, our bedroom, the basement. There are still new lights to put up and photos to hang- and plenty of projects big and small. We've managed to devote parts of each weekend to making a dent in those tasks though, and slowly this is becoming home. (I'm grateful that any further painting as well as outdoor projects have to wait until the spring- at least the pressure is off there!)

Being homeowners is great and stressful, fun and expensive. A new journey- one requiring patience, an emergency fund, compromise, creativity, and a lot of can-do attitude. We're feeling our way along, and picking up new skills as we go (home improvement area as well relationship!).

We're getting to know our neighborhood, too. We've already spent time at The Fountain, Ultraviolet Cafe, the Spectrum, and Spinners, as well as with takeout from Ichiban and Sake Cafe. We've made a list of places to try, and places to visit.

Transition is the theme for now- missing old places, discovering places both new and familiar, making a home of our own, finding and keeping connections. Looking forward to Christmas morning in our home, Christmas eve and day with family, and New Years with good friends. Salut!

With you my friend, I am there

2009-11-17T22:13:00.005-05:00

It's a busy, busy week- new job, working on the house, packing, moving, you get the picture.

But I wanted to share one thing, as belated as it may be (and I hope it's not too late):

The beloved Adirondack Girl Scout camp that I attended for many summers - and that has been around for 70 years- is at risk of being closed.

Camp Little Notch has been among the very special places in my life-- and the lives of so many other women and girls.

For more information on the history of the camp, the issues at hand, the enormous movement that has been working to keep this amazing piece of land in the hands of the Girl Scouts of Northeastern New York, and to add your support to keeping Little Notch open, visit
http://www.friendsofcln.org/

And media folks, if you're listening: please consider covering this story. This is a story of love and friendship, nature and inspiration, of helping girls grow strong, and the power of place. And, sadly, it's the story of the economy and the choices that have to be made. It's a story worth telling.

Things I'm looking forward to in Albany

2009-11-12T11:49:00.012-05:00

Mozzarella sticks with raspberry sauce on nearly every menu. I'll say it again, Albany NEEDS to claim this as its own before the rest of the world catches on. These Albany Sticks are the best appetizer you'll ever have.

Thacher Park just a short drive up the road.
Shopping At the Warehouse on a regular basis.
My favorite Albany restaurants, including Debbie's Kitchen (the #12!), the Gingerman, Bomber's, and Ichiban (my favorite sushi anywhere).
Washington Park
Sunday afternoons spent learning family recipes from my mom
Coffee shops that are open past 7pm (specifically the Muddy Cup and Uncommon Grounds). I also have high hopes for the closest cafe to our new place: Cafe Perk Ups (bonus: crepes!).
Not only being there for all the family gatherings, but being able to host them in our own home.
More time to get to know Wolff's Biergarten
Evenings hanging out with our siblings
Reconnecting with our friends in the area, and the ones who pass through on a regular basis.
More time with the family that also happens to be friends.
Connecting with newer friends in the area.
The Spectrum (the movies AND the snack bar)
Mahar's
The Miss Albany Diner (for sale! Buy it!)
Being around to see the kids in the family as they grow
Albany All Stars Roller Derby!
The Adirondacks just a quick jaunt up the Northway
On a related note, being able to hop in the car with my dad on summer days off to spend an afternoon sailing at the lake.

Not having to drive over the mountains in snow storms to be there for winter holidays.
Working downtown
Checking out the Troy Winter Market (summer too!)
Lark Street
Time with our families being a normal part of daily life, rather than a drive and an overnight stay and packing every possible visit into one weekend.

(Again, I reserve the right to add to this list- and I know I will exercise that right.)

Things I'll Miss about the Valley

2009-11-11T09:32:00.017-05:00

The mountains. Small but pretty, different every day, visible almost anywhere you go-- including from our apartment. I'll miss hiking and driving up these mountains, and watching them change with the seasons.

The restaurants. India House. Sierra Grill. Amy's Place. Apollo. Sunrise. Mount Tom's ice cream. I could go on and on.
And on the topic of food: Trader Joe's. It's going to be so very hard to adjust to living far from TJs.
The bike trails, oh the bike trails.
The laid back, work to live, happy vibes.
My Girl Scout troop.
Walking to work through charming Easthampton.
Berkshire Brewing Company's Steel Rail extra pale ale.
Working on a beautiful campus in a beautiful building with great people.
Our CSA farmshare, in which the farm was a 1/2 mile from our house, and picking up our share involved a weekly trip to the farm, picking flowers and herbs and raspberries, and seeing nearly everyone we know.
The running trails along the Mill River, through the woods, past farmland and community gardens. My running buddy.
Webs! (Although after packing up my yarn stash, it's clear I need to stay away from any yarn stores for a long, long while.)
Strolling Main St., Northampton
The potlucks
Trivia, and the Plunder Cats

Above all else (even above Trader Joe's), I'll miss the friends we've made here. We are so, so lucky to have found such great people here. I mean really, awesome people. I have faith that our friendships will endure the little bit of distance, that we'll talk often and see each other regularly. But it's hard leave these people that I love so much.

(I reserve the right to add to this list as more comes up, which it will.)

Addendum:

The RMVs, which are generally pleasant, and a "long wait" is 15 minutes. And people still complain! They have no idea. I'm not ready to re-experience the Albany DMV hell.

Ours

2009-11-09T20:50:00.008-05:00

We hunted and searched, found and pondered, weighed pros and weighed cons, worked and saved, stressed and fretted, laughed and squealed and gasped, gathered papers and signed our names a thousand times, took a deep breath and handed over checks with many digits, and then: the keys were passed, and the little house was ours.

Holding hands tight and jumping in with shouts of joy: Another Big Life Moment, ours.

Choosing Albany

2009-11-04T17:12:00.003-05:00

Buying a house has been in our "next few years" plan for awhile. Originally we thought spring of 2010 would be a good time, but then these tax incentives came up and we found ourselves looking at the end of this past summer.

These grown-up decisions aren't easy- every part of this process has involved difficult choices.

I've spent years daydreaming about owning a home, but reality is different than those daydreams. We had to figure out what we could realistically afford (and come to terms with the fact that 'first house' and 'dream house' are two different things), and where this house would be. We had to think about what was important to us, and the types of visions we had for our life together. For years and years, our long-term plan has been to buy a home in Albany. This was the plan for a lot of reasons: our families are there, it's affordable, we like it, we feel a loyalty to it, we see exciting things happening there. This summer, we thought and reflected, weighed the options, and decided these things are still important to us. It would be difficult to leave our life in MA, but it was time. This place and these people will be in our hearts and our lives for a long time, I know. Our friendships are strong and will endure the distance, and we'll be back to visit often. But home is Upstate New York.

Over the summer, I was speaking to a friend who is expecting a baby in January. Her immediate family is spread out among four states (mom in South Carolina, brother in New York, dad and sister at different ends of Vermont, herself in New Jersey). She was lamenting the fact that she would have no family support system around her when the baby arrived. She had her husband, and there would be visitors, but all she wanted was to be in a spot surrounded by her immediate family.

Her story made me realize how lucky we are to have most of our family in one area. Our families are both tight-knit and great-- family birthday parties are regular events, cousins grow up close to one another, the support network is strong. We're not ready to have kids just yet, but when we are I want them to grow up in the middle of that kind of family. I want them to know our parents well, to see extended family more than a few times a year. That's important to both Patrick and I.

And then there's Albany itself. This city that I love, with so much potential, that needs people like us there. We have energy to give it, we see the good that is there and the good that can be there. We want to be a part of the community that is working to make Albany a great place to live. We've learned a lot from our time in the Pioneer Valley about strong communities and what makes an area vibrant. People in the Valley are proud to live here-- we want to bring that to Albany.

And so, if all goes well, we'll be Albany homeowners as of tomorrow. The next few weeks will be full of transition and sad goodbyes, but we're ready to return to our All-America City.

Getting here

2009-11-04T12:02:00.001-05:00

Three years and four months ago, we moved to Northampton, Massachusetts. Pat was headed to UMass Amherst to finish a degree, and I was job-hunting after finishing my Masters program at SUNY Albany.

Our decision to head to Massachusetts was based on school, and our desire to live somewhere different for awhile. In the months leading up to our move, I started to worry. I wasn't sure I wanted to leave Albany. I liked life there. I had a good group of friends, I knew the area like the back of my hand, I liked being near our families, I was feeling settled. I was sad about leaving all that, and the idea of moving to a place where we knew hardly anyone was scary. Finding a job in a place where I had no connections was proving to be very hard. At one point, after a trip to MA to check out apartments, I cried in the car on the Mass Pike. I wanted to put the brakes on the plan to move and keep things exactly as they were.

But we didn't. We found an apartment that we loved, we packed a truck, and with the help of many reliable and strong friends, we moved our life to a new town in a new state. Not terribly far, but all of it new.

I took a job as a nanny while I looked for a 'real' job. In my free time I biked all the trails around town, I explored the shops on Main St, we tried the restaurants that we could walk to from our apartment. I missed Albany, but this place was growing on me. There were mountains visible where ever I went, the sky was unlike any other, the people were laid back, the attitude was right up my alley.

Slowly, this became home, and a lot of life happened here. We met some of our best friends, I found a job, we adopted a kitten, we invested in an air mattress which was used by visitors from near and far, we got engaged, we played trivia, we planned a wedding, we moved to another town, we celebrated the election of President Obama with dancing in the streets of Northampton, Patrick grew a beard (and a few months later, shaved it off), we had a winter of potlucks, we found community, I ran races, Pat helped grow a business, we took classes, Pat graduated, we developed our cooking skills, I had a Girl Scout troop, we climbed mountains, and we fell in love with this valley.

So why would we ever decide to move away from so much that was good? It wasn't an easy decision, but I'll tell you all about it in the next post.

--------------
all photos by me except the last one, by Patrick.

Moving forward

2009-10-29T16:27:00.004-04:00

Last month, we spent our first wedding anniversary having our potential new home inspected.

Yep, we're in the process of buying a house! It's thrilling and terrifying and exciting and stressful and eeee!

The house (not quite ours yet, but close) is in Albany. While we absolutely love the Pioneer Valley and our friends here, our grand plan was always to settle in our hometown. We'll be within a few miles of both sets of parents, and we'll be able to give back to a city that is near and dear to our hearts (and maybe we'll get to attend some of those famous All Over Albany events!).

This is something we've dreamed about and worked towards for a long time- it's surreal to be in the midst of it. The next month promises to be bonkers, with packing and goodbyes and moving and painting and leaving my job and starting a new one. Stay tuned for more...

"Life is too short to waste. Dreams are fulfilled only through action, not through endless planning to take action." ~D. Schwartz

Not so candid cameras

2009-10-28T10:39:00.006-04:00

I love this idea. We adopted a number of antique cameras from Pat's uncle, and my dad has a rather impressive collection of his own. My dad's sat on a family room shelf when I was a kid, and occassionally I'd get him to show me how they worked, but for the most part both collections just sit in a box. This display idea is so whimsical and fun-- I love the playfulness of framed cameras, poised to take your photo. And look! A neon pink 110!

p.s. After trying both, I'm declaring Vi.sualize the image bookmarking winner over We Heart It - it's just much easier to sort and find images once they're bookmarked. My Vi.sualize page of collected images is here.

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(Image via Houzz)

Just souper

2009-10-27T13:56:00.004-04:00

Sunday night I made butternut squash soup.

Monday night it was potato leek soup.

And there is a batch of tomato black bean soup cooking the day away in our slow cooker at this very moment.

It's just that kind of week- gray and chilly, the trees quickly becoming skeletons, and a need for coziness in full swing.

Little projects

2009-10-21T10:27:00.007-04:00

One Strap Baby Booties
Originally uploaded by mon petit violon

I have a number of friends expecting babies this winter and spring, which seems like a perfect reason to dive back into some crochet projects. Conveniently, baby projects also tend to be small, and small/quick projects will be the key to me finishing anything this autumn and winter!

I have a Webs gift card (courtesy of Meg and Steve) burning a hole in my pocket- this might be the perfect excuse to buy a new crochet book.

(How adorable are these booties? I think I could handle making a few pairs of these for the little ones!)

PR

2009-10-20T08:16:00.005-04:00

On Sunday I ran a 5k on a very cold, rainy, windy morning. I made myself go- I had already paid the registration fee, and I was meeting two friends there. But I soooo didn't want to go. I sooo wanted to stay in bed.

But I went. I bundled up and I ran. Along with a couple hundred other brave souls, I ran past a 1700s-era cemetery, through muddy fields, and alongside tractors, all the while the wind gusts smacked and rain pelted against my skin. And I crossed the finish line with my fastest time since 2003 (and only 5 seconds off that time, my true personal record).

Patrick bundled up too and cheered me on, took pictures, was the great supporter he always is. It made the miserable conditions much more bearable. He even bought me a bagel, soup, and a chai latte at Woodstar afterwards.

I'm glad I got out of bed- and glad I got to spend the rest of the day on the couch, under blankets, sipping tea and eating brownies.

Maybe

2009-10-19T22:02:00.001-04:00

Digging Ingrid's new video-

taking pictures

2009-10-16T19:03:00.001-04:00

Photography has been a hobby of my dad's since he was in college. While I was growing up he photographed weddings as a side job, and before that he played around with portraits and processing. He has drawers and boxes brimming with photos- family, landscape, nature, you name it. At my parents' house there's a framed series of shots he took when I was just a few weeks old. He set up a homemade portrait studio in our basement- a white sheet as a background, some lighting, and a stool. The result is a number of black and white shots of me with each of my parents. When I was a kid he'd let me take his photo with his 35mm, showing me how to hold it and how to advance the film with my thumb using the metal lever and waiting for that satisfying click. Photography, in some form, has always been a part of my life.

My first camera was a neon yellow 110. I took it to summer camp, on vacation, and out to the backyard (somewhere there's a roll I shot of toads that my friends and I caught, all of them lined up in a wagon). From there it was various point-and-shoots, until my dad passed along his Minolta SLR to me when I went to college. I didn't use it a lot because I was so nervous about damaging it (the thing was so solid though- it was all metal, heavy, substantial), but I did bring it with me to London- some of my favorite photos from my months there were taken on Dad's old Minolta. For college graduation in 2003, my parents bought me my own Minolta SLR. It was just before the digital camera age took over, and within a few years I didn't have much patience for film. I used Patrick's digital camera (an early Canon A-series point-and-shoot) and in 2006 I bought a Canon Digital Elph- a camera I still use quite a bit-- I'm thinking of replacing the little guy with a newer model (conveniently, Elphs are now less than half what I paid three years ago). My main camera now is the Nikon D80 that Pat and I share- a wedding gift to ourselves, this is a camera we spent many years lusting after. I still have a lot to learn on it, and I still use my point-and-shoot fairly often, but the D80 is an amazing piece of equipment.
All along the way though, I've documented- regardless of the camera. I can't tell you the number of times friends have confessed to not worrying about bringing a camera along anymore because they knew I'd be taking pictures. And if I wasn't snapping, Pat certainly would be. I have albums and albums of photos from each phase of my life- although I admit most albums of the past few years are in the form of Flickr sets. I just checked-- 2,785 of my photos live on Flickr, posted between February 2005 and now.

I'm not a great photographer, and I have tons to learn (I've never taken a photography class, beyond 8th grade tech ed, but I'm always on the lookout for one- I'd love to. I tried to beg my way into a photo class in college, but without the studio art pre-reqs it was a lost cause). I enjoy the experience of taking photos and the way of seeing that happens when I have a camera in hand. I love documenting this way-- for me, it's been more about the moment and the emotion than the technicalities (although I recognize the importance of understanding the technology and concepts, and I know I need work on both fronts). But throughout my life I've wanted to remember these times, these places, these people, and these feelings. Sometimes writing does it for me, but sometimes only the snap of my camera will do.

Heart It

2009-10-09T15:19:00.008-04:00

I'm always on the lookout for new ways to save images from around the web-- photos that I like, inspiring rooms, crafty ideas-- whatever catches my eye. I recently happened upon a handy image-bookmarking site. We Heart It lets you save images found on their site as well as elsewhere (this page explains how it works). Unlike saving photos in a folder on your desktop, We Heart It saves source information along with the image. You can see the images I've hearted here (you can tell I've been into photos of homes recently, eh? The transition to fall has that effect.) Let me know if you sign on- we can be contacts in yet another online space!

Update: I'm also trying Vi.sualize.us, which may prove to be better if only for the ease of searching bookmarked images. I'll let you know the verdict!

---
photo by flickr user Carlos Porto

evolution

2009-10-07T11:30:00.012-04:00

A link floated by early this morning and led me into the world of old blogs- my own abandoned writing, and that of friends and former friends-- the stuff that seems to stick around on these here Internets. Reading just a few paragraphs was enough to remind me of just how different Now is from Then. It brought a wave of gratitude for the love and support in my life these days. The people we surround ourselves with make such an impact on the way we feel about life- I'm thankful to have so many fun, positive, caring people around me. I spent a couple years letting the wrong type of energy in- energy that made me feel insecure, anxious, and cut down. I have the ultimate control over how I feel, but part of that control is in who gets let in. I see that now, and I'm glad for the lessons that kept me moving towards the kind of energy that makes me feel empowered, happy, and loved. It's the kind I hope to create for others, energy that creates good.

My early-to-mid-20s were a time of growth and transition, of mistakes, of asking forgiveness and forgiving, of figuring out what I wanted and what I didn't. They were an important time, and there was plenty of fun among the tougher things, but I wouldn't want to go back. I've held on to the parts of those days that are worth keeping, and left the rest back there. In these late-20s I feel more confident, more grounded, more aware of where I want to go, what I want out of this life, and how I want to make those things happen.

I don't mind looking back and reflecting once in a while, but mostly I like this time and place right here.

******
photo 1
photo 2

Farm Flowers

2009-08-19T10:15:00.002-04:00

Thoughts on Marriage

2009-08-06T16:42:00.026-04:00

With recent engagement announcements (exciting!), upcoming weddings to attend (also exciting!), and our first anniversary on the horizon (exciting and whoa nelly!), I've been thinking a lot about marriage.

We've been married for nearly 11 months. And after 10 years of unmarried togetherness (including 3 years of co-habitation), what's the difference?

Planning our wedding, getting married surrounded by our loved ones, and embarking on this journey has been for us about renewed and fortified commitment to our relationship-- this thing that is bigger than either of us. There is him, there is me, and there is The Marriage. It doesn't shout about it or take up room on the couch; it's a subtle thing, but it's ever-present. We've always been a strong team and we've worked hard at good communication, but by entering into this larger whole our relationship has grown up a bit. Things have shifted in subtle but important ways.

Marriage sometimes (ok, often) gets a bad rap. Ball-and-chain, giving up your freedom, entering a life of boredom, something like prison, blah blah blah. But I've found just the opposite. Marriage, in the way that we've entered it, is freeing. It has freed us to dream big, to plan concretely, to rise above little things that used to butt in. Being boyfriend-girlfriend, and then fiancés, I thought I was feeling the full joy of Us. But that was just a taste. This marriage has brought me a joyfulness I never felt before. Every morning I wake up and see his head next to mine and I am giddy (even if that head is snoring a bit). On top of the love and happiness we've always felt together, there is a new bliss and excitement and I-can't-believe-I-get-to-be-married-to-you joy in our lives. It's not something we take for granted- the marriage deserves our attention and nurturance and gratitude. Things aren't perfect, no way- that would be creepy. We have arguments and grumpy moments and I take bad moods out on him when I shouldn't (working on it...), but we get through to the other side. Above all of it, the little things and the bigger, is our Marriage, enveloping us and elevating us- as a couple and as individuals.

Yes, for us marriage is different. It is the most important thing I've ever been a part of.

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For some good thoughts on marriage:

Meg's Practical Wedding posts on the topic.
Laura Munson's thought-provoking New York Times article on her own marriage and a love that is strong, patient, and unconditional.
Cate's post on how marriage freed her.
Sara's Successful Relationship series is good as well as this post- It's about the Marriage Not the Wedding.

And on the lighter side, Real Simple's answers to "What is the Secret to a Good Marriage?"

p.s. Best wishes to Meg of A Practical Wedding who gets married on Sunday. Her blog brought sanity to my own wedding planning-- I can't wait to read about her wedding experience!

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photo 1 by flickr user h.koppdelaney
photo 2 by Upstate Photographers

Adirondack dreams

2009-06-18T11:31:00.004-04:00

On this dreary, rainy, chilly June day at the office I'm dreaming about sunny days on the lake. Just over a month until we head north for sailing, swimming, laying on the beach, sitting by the fire, taking in the stars.

Shooting Stars

2009-05-04T10:48:00.005-04:00

A few months ago I had one of those websurfing days where one link led me to another led me to another. I mean, I have those days all the time, but I'm telling you about this one particular time when a friend's Facebook page linked to a memorial page for one of her high school teachers. Something made me click it, which led me to a speech given at SUNY Potsdam by this teacher, Kathleen Sipher. I never knew her, but the text of that speech has stayed with me. You can read the whole thing, entitled A Survivor's Story, here (I recommend it, for sure).

The following bit in particular has popped into my head more than once recently, when I've had to make similar choices (and don't we all, everyday?):

"My husband is a morning person – he gets up promptly every day at 4 am. No alarm clock, no struggle to wake up. I’m definitely not a morning person – I was voted off the breakfast table by my family long before the show Survivor. Anyway, this morning at 4:30, my husband woke me up to tell me about this great meteor show going on. He said he’d seen dozens of meteors and did I want to get up and see it? Well, that bed was so warm and cozy and I was so happily sleeping that I told him to go watch it and tell me about it later. So he went away and I tried to go back to sleep. Then it hit me. I had to pee! Damn! I tried to put it off, to ignore it, but I finally just had to get out of bed to go to the bathroom. And while I was up, I looked out the picture window and saw him sitting in the hot tub and I then I noticed several shooting stars. So, I just gave in, put on my suit, and ran out in the 20-degree cold air to jump into the hot tub. We sat back in the warm water and counted the shooting stars we saw – in 45 minutes we saw over 500. It was absolutely awesome – better than the 4th of July.

So I guess the lesson from this little story is again that you shouldn’t give up happiness for pleasure. Being in that bed was so warm and pleasurable. And I almost gave in to it. But I would have missed an opportunity that is once in a lifetime."
-Kathleen Sipher

Hello again, hello

2009-04-29T15:20:00.012-04:00

It's been awhile since I've shared anything here. Life has been full, in mostly really great ways. I've been seeing a lot of live music, going on bike rides, taking an art class, watching the leaves and flowers burst, and easing myself back in to a running routine.

Here's a little (mostly) visual update:

Last week we saw three live shows: The Felice Brothers, Elvis Perkins in Dearland, and the Decemberists. Each at a different venue, each awesome.

The Felice Brothers had us all dancing and yeeehawing- the accordion was my favorite.

The Elvis Perkins show involved the trombonist in the crowd, that crazy marching band drum, and more dancing-

The Decemberists show was at a college (which apparently means ultra high security these days), in a gym, and it was rad. High-energy, wise cracks from Colin Malloy, and a perfect set list. I can't wait to see them again when they come back around in August.

Spiffying up the porch and planting herbs and flowers

...And then we were invaded by winged ants. Hopefully they are packing their bags, because while I'm sure they were very nice ants, they were not welcome on our porch, ok?

Sculpting and painting and printing and drawing in art class

I've never been a good artist, but I've always enjoyed it. This class if full of nice people, and I always leave feeling relaxed and inspired. Playing around in an art studio is an excellent de-stresser.

Finalizing the layout on our wedding book (finally)

This baby has gone to print. Just a few tiny little wedding-related ends left to tie up. We should also pick a few wedding photos to enlarge and frame, but that task feels incredibly daunting.

Buying and riding my new bike

I love it, I love it! Hopefully the bike trail will be fixed soon. (Read about the gigantic hole and the repair efforts here. You can even chip in to fix it if you want!)

Enjoying this place

There is tons of stuff going on in the valley these days, and it's been great to actually spend weekends in town taking it all in. This weekend alone is Northampton Pride, Twist, and Derrill's Race (my first 5k in two years, eek). Oh, and my herbs have sprouted!

I continue to be unsure of what I want to write about here. I want to come back to it, and I will, I just have to figure out how I want to go about it.

Happy spring!

photos: recently

2009-03-24T11:38:00.010-04:00

projects in progress

funfetti cupcake, for you

t he holyoke saint patrick's day parade, 3/22/09, photos by patrick

spring at the smith college bulb show, 3/21/09

selling girl scout cookies at the new england webcomics weekend

daffodils for a good cause

Eric Carle love

2009-03-13T09:05:00.004-04:00

I spent yesterday afternoon at the Eric Carle Museum of Picture Book Art. It's just up the road in Amherst, sitting on a beautiful spot next to Hampshire College, in the middle of an apple orchard. The architecture of the museum is breathtaking and its contents are lovely. If you've never been there, I recommend a trip, with or without kids (and when you go, don't miss the hands-on art studio).

WAMC's The Roundtable is broadcasting from the museum this morning-- I'm listening while I work right now. Word has it that Carle himself will be on later in the morning. While no longer a Valley resident, Eric Carle's influence is strong around here. Many people I know have personal and/or professional connections to the museum, the author/artist, and his work.

And guess what I just learned? Eric Carle has a blog! (I'm sure at least one of you reading knew this- Hi Meg!) There isn't much there yet, but even online his words are gentle and his stories sweet. You can check it out here.

Have a happy, sunny weekend!

Gold

2009-03-12T08:06:00.004-04:00

Last night, walking up the steps into the elementary school, I spotted four green bursts poking through the ground next to the building. Nature's first green, right there, standing proud. I called to the 13-year-old girls walking in with me to come look. They dropped their aloof coolness for a moment to squeal with me: Spring!

The snow has retreated to just a few murky patches.
The light and shadows say brighter seasons are coming, hold on a little longer, we're almost there.

*****
photo by me, taken one year ago.

Pretty Pictures

2009-03-11T13:19:00.009-04:00

Time for a little plug on behalf of some folks I really like-- our wedding photographers recently revamped their blog. For some mid-rainy-day prettiness, check out the new look of Upstate Photographers. I adore Paul and Brenda. Wrapping up our book layout and final products is bittersweet-- I'll miss them! I'm sure we'll be calling on them a couple years down the line for family portraits!

Antsy

2009-03-09T12:14:00.001-04:00

Cabin fever or spring fever or just a need for something new-- whatever it is I've been mighty restless lately. In addition to letting out the occasional "argh!", the antses in my pants have led me to:

Sign up for an art class. Starting in a couple weeks, Julia and I will be channeling our inner Van Goghs at Art Always. We're taking an eight-week course in which we'll have the chance to explore drawing, painting, printmaking, sculpture, fabric arts and who knows what else. Divine.
Write. I don't know what's been keeping me from this, but it's time to just do it, no matter how crappy it is. This project was a good jump start.
Daydream about volunteer vacations. Habitat for Humanity's Global Village program looks amazing. Not to mention the hundreds listed on Charity Channel. Reforesting, building schools, organic farming, trail preservation-- there are so many amazing opportunities out there. I'd love to do one of these with the husband.

Researching which bike to buy this spring. I am so done with my too-big, second-hand men's mountain bike and I've been promising myself a new one for years. I'm currently drooling over this baby (the one in the photo above). I can't wait to find out what it's like to ride a bike that's actually the right size for me. Here's hoping there will be some extremely good spring sales on bicycles...

Along with the change in seasons, I'm hopeful that a little daydreaming and an injection of creativity will help me get over this fidgety feeling. If not, it may be time to think bigger.

Reminder

2009-02-26T13:06:00.003-05:00

The brook would lose its song if we removed the rocks.
—Wallace Stegner

This was Today's Daily Thought from Real Simple, I thought it was worth sharing. I can't wait for spring days warm enough for creek walking...

What a beautiful day*

2009-02-25T23:55:00.003-05:00

photo by pat, delicious funfetti cookies by julia.

There are five minutes left of my 28th birthday. A Wednesday birthday (and Ash Wednesday at that) is never as fun-filled as a weekend birthday, but today was very sweet. There was a nice lunch with my co-workers, a birthday éclair the size of my head, funny voicemails and serenades, cute phone calls, nice emails, a couple of fun packages, and a plethora of Facebook greetings. My Girl Scout troop sang an enthusiastic round of Happy Birthday, Julia baked funfetti cookies (if you like funfetti cake you need to try these cookies), Patrick picked up sushi, and Lost was extra awesome. I felt loved, and there's no better way to start off another year in the life.

*"Just like the day before, we waited together/Goddamn what a beautiful day" -Ash Wednesday, the Kamikaze Hearts

I'd like to buy a Vowell

2009-02-25T15:00:00.004-05:00

We have tickets to see Sarah Vowell at the Calvin on Friday! Can't wait!

New Recipe Week, the recap

2009-02-24T21:04:00.011-05:00

It is so easy to get lazy about food. If we don't plan, we eat a lot of pasta and take out, and then feel bad about it (well, I do anyway). So last week I did the thing I plan to do every weekend, but rarely get to: I planned the week's meals and I shopped based on the menus. And last week, we ate better than we have in a long time.

Over the course of the week, we made four new-to-us recipes. Nothing too fancy, just some new combinations. Our Week in Recipes went like this:

Sunday- zesty roasted chicken and potatoes (recipe from the Betty Crocker Cookbook) and steamed broccoli with garlic oil (from the January/February Everyday Food)

Monday- lemony shrimp with white beans and cous cous (February Real Simple). Here's what it looked like (this was one of my favorites of the week):

Photo by Patrick. Forgive us for having red wine with seafood, that's what was open.

Tuesday- crispy chicken (February Real Simple) and sauteed spinach with red onion (Giada De Laurentiis' Everyday Pasta)

Wednesday- we ditched our planned meal of orecchiette with roasted broccoli and walnuts (February Real Simple) in favor of making pizza with Julia and Seth.

Thursday- Our weekly trivia night, so we scheduled leftover night. Despite planing this, we still have a bunch of tasty leftovers-- great for lunches and dinners during this busy week.

Friday- baked pastina and chicken casserole (Everyday Pasta). I'm a sucker for anything involving pastina, a staple of my childhood diet.

Saturday- taco and game night at a friends' house (ok, technically this wasn't part of New Recipe Week, but it rounded out our week of home-cooked meals nicely!)

My favorite of the new recipes was Monday's lemony shrimp with cous cous, followed closely by the baked pastina. Tasty tasty. This week was a bit heavy on the chicken recipes, but we had some to use up, and in addition to trying new recipes, I wanted to make use of things we had. I also planned some ingredient overlap to save a little cash.

When things got busy and crazy last summer (moving, family stuff, wedding), deliberately planned meals went out the window. We're finally getting back on track. It's overly ambitious for us to make four new recipes every week, but I hope that last week jump-started us on more consistent meal-planning and healthier dinners. The Extended Adolescence Meal Plan is out. It's time to take a little more control over this part of life.

Happy birthdays

2009-02-20T17:38:00.001-05:00

This weekend brings the birthdays of two of my best friends. For the past seven years, we've celebrated our birthdays together with some other friends in late February or early/mid March. This year, because one of us just started a new job and another is in an intense nursing program (not to mention working at a health clinic in Haiti at the moment), we're putting off the annual Birthday Weekend celebration until the summer. Our past Birthday Weekends have involved walking around various northeast cities (and forests) shivering and doing our best to stay warm with laughter and lots of eating. While I always love the winter celebrations, I'm looking forward to a Birthday Weekend in the sun this year! I'm hoping it involves a dock, summery beverages, swimming, and the traditional heaps of food.

I'll be thinking of you two lovely women this weekend, as well as the rest of you who have been a part of our celebrations. Here's to another grand year of adventures, stories, lessons, celebrations, and laughter. xoxo.

morning music

2009-02-19T07:31:00.000-05:00

I just remembered that Blitzen Trapper is playing Pearl Street next Wednesday (my birthday!). When I first saw them on the schedule I thought about getting tickets, but since I forgot until just now it seems unlikely that our plans for that night will include the show. I do like this band and this video though-- if you have four minutes, use them to enjoy the prettiness of the sound and the images:

Blurb book of wedding photos, end result

2009-02-16T21:44:00.009-05:00

So back in December I asked for photo book making recommendations-- maybe you remember. The idea was that, for Christmas, I was going to put together a book of our wedding photos for our parents to hold them over until we received the (much higher end) photo books from our photographers. I received some good information and links, and decided to go with Blurb.

You may also remember the intense frustration I ran into while compiling the books. I don't think the problems I ran into were Blurb's fault. In retrospect, I should have done a few things differently:

Uh, like, start sooner. Apparently I will never learn.
Alternatively, I could have accepted that I wasn't going to finish by Christmas and waited to receive the DVDs of fully-edited high res photos from our photographers. The discs arrived in the mail just as I was finishing the books, too late.
Since I was downloading the giant files from the online gallery of our photos, just getting the photos took forever. For-ev-er.

Had I started earlier, it would have been less frustrating when it took eons for my less-than-speedy computer to deal with those giant files. It took many many minutes just to place each photo. Argh.
The slooooowness of the process led to me working on this project into the wee hours of the morning a few days in a row. I was so tired by the end that I made silly mistakes-- underestimating the bleed (re: chopping tops of heads off), leaving space between photos where there shouldn't have been space, etc.
Again, starting earlier would have made the not-so-speedy-delivery less aggravating. It was about 10 days between ordering and delivery, which is not so bad really, but it's not the quickness I'm used to. We gave Pat's parents their book when they were out to visit on New Years' day and just gave my parents theirs when we were at their house a couple weeks ago.
Lastly, this project should not have been my first photo book. Again, better laid plans-- I should have done a practice run with a smaller, less time-sensitive (and consuming) book.

I honestly don't blame Blurb for the slowness-- it was mostly my computer, and partially the size of the files. Had I started earlier (or accepted that it wasn't going to be ready by Christmas), many of the problems I ran into either wouldn't have happened or wouldn't have been as frustrating.

So, the good parts. I love how the book came out. The print quality is good, the paper quality is lovely (I upgraded to the premium paper), and everyone who's seen it has gushed over it. I made three 80-page books, each one is hardcover with a dust jacket, and made with the premium paper. They came to about $42 each. This is a bargain for such a gorgeous book. I was happy with Blurb's layout software-- while not entirely customizable, it offered enough options for me. There were a few things that were a bit limiting, but overall it was fine for what I was doing.

Another nice thing about putting together our own book was being able to incorporate some guest photos in addition to the pro photos. I put together a page using our friends' photos from our rehearsal and rehearsal dinner and used a few guest photos from the reception as well.

I'm looking forward to doing a book of our honeymoon photos and working on some books as a way of finally organizing the thousands upon thousands of photos we've taken over the years-- and hopefully keeping it up in the future. I love the idea of having a bookshelf full of our photobooks, neatly organized by year or adventure or occasion, ready to be flipped through at any time. Having the captured moments on Flickr is nice, but having them in a book in one's hand is even nicer.

Hearts to you

2009-02-14T10:56:00.006-05:00

My plan was to crochet oodles of these hearts and send them to everyone I know (seriously, I love Valentine's Day!). Right... I made 3 1/2 before I ran out of yarn and time, and there are more then 3 1/2 people I was hoping to shower with hearts. For now, I'll share the photo instead.

Happy day!

I like Valentine's Day, alright?

2009-02-13T17:30:00.008-05:00

There's a lot of bah-hum-bugging about Valentine's Day going around. When I've asked my attached friends about their Valentine's plans, nearly all of them have said "eh, Valentine's Day is dumb, we don't do anything"-- or something with that jist. You know what I mean. I don't get it.

I appreciated this post at LittleBrownPen about a meaningful Valentine's Day on a sparse budget ($20, to be exact). To me, this is the point of Valentine's Day-- a little reminder to just take some time to enjoy one another. It's a good thing to do at this point in the winter. I'll admit, my last solo February was in 1997, so maybe I'm not sensitive enough to the pains of being single on 2/14. But for those who are in a relationship, I don't understand. I'm not talking about blowing big bucks on a hideous Valentine-themed diamond-encrusted piece of jewelry. But what's so bad about getting out the crayons and drawing a heart for your beloved? Or carving out some extra time to spend together? Take an average Saturday and find a little extra romance in the melting snow, it's good for you.

My husband and I spend a lot of time together-- I think we're very good at showing our appreciation and love for one another. That doesn't mean we can't find something to enjoy on a holiday that is all about L-O-V-E. Especially when it's gray outside, when the hubster is bogged down with homework, and we've just had a crazy week. Ok fine, maybe Hallmark invented it (although National Geographic begs to differ), but still. I don't see the perks of kicking St. Valentine in the shins-- is there something to prove that I'm missing?

Tomorrow, our first married Valentine's Day, we'll make breakfast (cinnamon raisin french toast, freshly ground coffee, grapefruit). That Valentine of mine will spend a few hours working at his desk, I'll go to yoga class. In the afternoon our plan is to check out some exhibits at a contemporary photography museum in the area followed by dinner, local beer, and conversation at a brew pub we've been meaning to try since we moved out here. Just us. Nothing fancy, but a little something different than a normal Saturday. A reason to slow down.

Why not kick the cynicism and enjoy one another tomorrow? Have a good conversation. Laugh a lot. Find a little romance in the every day. Cut a heart out of construction paper and give it to a cute boy or a pretty girl. I promise, Hallmark won't get a dime.

Aunt Min

2009-02-09T07:35:00.001-05:00

This is the photo of my maternal grandparents on their wedding day in the early 1920s. The little flower girl on the far right is my great aunt Minnie. Aunt Minnie (real name Carmella, called Minnie always) passed away on Thursday at the age of 95. She was living on her own and cooking for herself and her family (including making her own sauce every Sunday) up until a week before she died. Her sister, my grandmother, died 11 years ago just a few weeks shy of her 95th birthday. The photo on the left is Aunt Min in September at our wedding-- looking good for 95, eh? I only hope these women passed those genes along to the rest of us!

We're heading out of town this afternoon for the wake and funeral and general family togetherness, back here tomorrow.

Buying the farm (share)

2009-02-03T21:35:00.007-05:00

It snowed again today, all day. I really do love snow, but this winter has been a bit much. I guess I should have splurged and bought those snow shoes this year.

Last week, in the midst of all the ice and cold, I convinced myself that spring will come eventually and signed us up for a farm share. Mountain View Farm is just around the corner from us, and from June through October we'll be making a weekly visit to the farm to pick up our just-picked veggies. We'll also be able to pick our own herbs, beans, berries, flowers, and peas. We'll even be able to use the farm for walks and picnics. Since we'll be getting tons of vegetables each week we're sharing our share (ha) with a couple friends.

The ideas in the book The Omnivore's Dilemma, by Michael Pollan have really influenced the way I think about food. With the farm share, we'll be eating food that is grown so very locally, in a sustainable way. It's not always easy to eat local and sustainably grown food, but at least for the summer and fall the farm share is a great solution.

Eating food grown and raised right here is heavily promoted around these parts. The area CISA (Community Involved in Sustaining Agriculture) is highly visible-- their 'Be a Local Hero' bumper stickers are plastered all over Valley cars. Agriculture is a big part of the lifestyle and economy in this part of New England, and there is a sense of responsibility to keeping it that way.

Community Supported Agriculture (CSA) farms are getting more popular, and farm shares are even available in urban areas. To find a CSA farm in your area, check out Local Harvest. It's good for you and good for your community.

***
Photo by Flickr user Asmey145.

warm legs

2009-02-02T18:51:00.000-05:00

My dear friend Emily knit me these leg warmers and delivered them on Sunday. I haven't owned a pair of these since dance classes as a little girl-- I'm loving them.

Here's Em last weekend, working on the leg warmers while Calvin catches a snooze.

***
Top photo by me, bottom photo by Patrick.

Every mile is two in winter. -George Herbert

2009-01-30T01:06:00.006-05:00

This past weekend brought, in a two shifts, seven visitors from five states. It brought the closest hitting (so far) very-bad-news-as-a-result-of-the-economy as a good friend lost her job when the magazine she worked for folded. It brought cheering-up, Valentine-making, secret missions, Tetris-playing, jolly-making, and reminiscing. We drank wine and tea, made Valentines, crocheted hats and scarfs, played Tetris, strolled in Northampton, ate pizza and blondies and noodles and bagels, and of course talked and talked, laughed and laughed.
We always question why we have these gatherings in cold places in the dead of winter-- vowing that next time we'll go to Jennie in Houston. It seems backwards, but I think there's a reason we tend to gather in the darkest, coldest months. By late January, togetherness is what we need. Filling our home with the energy and laughter of our friends sustains us at the time when we all long for sunlight and green grass. As last weekend came to a close and we all had to say our goodbyes, those friends left me feeling happy and warm and full of light.

Our very own cake wreplica!

2009-01-28T10:25:00.009-05:00

Cake wreck ornament, Originally uploaded by pcorreia

Remember when I suggested that it would be amazing to have a replica made of our wedding cake wreck?

Well, our cousin Meg actually made us our very own wreplica ornament! Its accuracy is rather unbelievable-- the cracks, the lopsidedness, the unfinished decoration-- it's a perfect image of the disaster. (Clicking on the photos will bring you to their Flickr pages where you can view them larger-- the only way to fully appreciate the level of detail).

She created the cake as a Christmas ornament, but you better believe this baby is staying out and on display all year long.

Meg is amazingly crafty (she's the one that designed and helped assemble our wedding invitations), and she has a brand new craft blog. Check out her handiwork and tales of their creation over at Mega*Crafty. You'll want to add this blog to your Google reader, it's good stuff.
****
Photos by Patrick.

At last

2009-01-21T09:24:00.006-05:00

What an amazing set of events we all witnessed yesterday. I watched the live broadcast of President Obama's inauguration alongside high school students and other employees of the school where I work, all of us gathered around a large screen set up in the dining hall, the room constantly erupting into applause. I walked back to the office with my co-workers later, all of us elated and breathless.

I've been thinking about how I will describe this moment in history to my future children and grandchildren, who will only know a world in which a black man can be President. I will tell them about election night, when across the country we danced in the streets. I will tell them about the doubts that existed during the campaign, how many times I heard people say that America will never elect a black man, or a man with the middle name Hussein, certainly not a black man named Barack Hussein Obama. But America did elect that man. I will tell them about the feeling among my generation, so jaded and so accustomed to not feeling represented-- today we know what it feels like to have hope and faith. Some of us have already fallen back on the old jadedness ("His words are the same as Bush's", "He's already letting us down", "He's just another politician"), but the rest of us are choosing to believe that this president is who he says he is, and we're willing to give him the time to show us. I think when they ask about this moment, the images will speak best: the images from the campaign, from election night, and most of all the images from the inauguration ceremony. My favorite set of photos from yesterday is over at The Big Picture.

Amid all the large historic moments and pageantry, another thing stood out to me, and I'm sure you noticed it too: the love between the President and the First Lady. We don't often see that kind of genuine love between people in the public eye. These two don't just love each other-- they really like each other. When they got out of the limo during the parade and walked down Pennsylvania Ave, they never let go of each other. Michelle alternated which hand she waved with, and whichever one wasn't waving was holding her husband's hand. And then of course, did you see the way they danced together at the balls last night?

Yesterday was refreshing and hopeful. I know we won't all be getting ponies and 3-day work weeks, but I do think we've entered a new era of respect, accountability, and vision. Here's hoping!

**********
photo: Reuters

1.20.09

2009-01-20T09:38:00.001-05:00

Can you believe it's finally here? What a day this will be.

Frozen solid

2009-01-15T18:13:00.005-05:00

According to weather.com, it is currently 9 degrees outside but feels like -3. I know I've talked about the weather enough, but it hasn't been this cold around here in a long time. This sort of painful cold reminds me of my college days in central New York. My alma mater is in the Finger Lakes region, right on the shores of Seneca Lake. Seneca is narrow but so deep it rarely freezes over. Here in the Pioneer Valley we are a bit sheltered thanks to the protection of a few mountain ranges. As a result it's always a few degrees warmer here than it is in the surrounding areas. But central New York is flat. Winds whip through, lake effect snow travels far, and the winters are really really cold. I miss the beauty of the lake and vineyards, but not much else about the geography out there. That's one thing I can say about these temperatures: at least (knock on wood) there's no biting wind.

The highly-regarded and very dedicated HWS sailing team practiced on the lake in the snow. It was a surreal thing to see. My sailor roommates came home from February practices with blue lips and stood in the hot shower for hours trying to thaw.

I wore long underwear under my jeans for the walk across campus to class, the hood of my ski jacket pulled tight around my face, only my eyes showing above my scarf. There was rarely a day between November and March that it didn't snow, and snow in April was common. It was during those arctic winters that I learned how to make various mixed drinks using hot beverages. I guess this cold snap is making me a bit nostalgic.

I'll need to post about something other than the weather, but I live in New England, talk about the weather is what we do.

********
photos: The Hobart and William Smith campus, taken during my most recent visit in December 2007.

Potlucky

2009-01-12T16:55:00.011-05:00

As I mentioned, on Saturday we had a potluck dinner. Our new(ish) apartment is good for hosting things like this (although really, everyone clumps together, regardless of how much space there is. At one point in the night everyone was in the dining room and kitchen-- the living room was totally deserted). While snow fell outside, our home was full of sweet and fun friends who brought delicious and cozy wintery things like:

butternut squash and goat cheese casserole
rice pilaf with pomegranate seeds and other special things
sweet potato biscuits
spinach-artichoke dip
homemade bread
greens with craisins and walnuts
salad with hard ricotta (how did I not know this exists??), roasted beets, and pomegranate vinaigrette
angel food cake with fruit and whipped cream
chocolatey chocolate chip cookies
mulled white wine sangria with all sorts of fancy fruits
Panettone (which we forgot about until 1 AM and proceeded to rip into. We used the leftovers for french toast the next day. Delish.)

Patrick and I made the Tuscan lasagna recipe that his mom brought back from their recent trip to Italy. It was our first try at it, and I'm happy to report that it was very tasty.

Calvin joined the party, playing with whomever wanted to play, and plopping himself in various doorways so that he could keep an eye on all the action. We had a few offers of people wanting to trade us our playful/aggressive/crazy cat for their mellow cat... it was tempting, but we kept him. (This photo of Calvin is by Patrick, and it's not from the other night, but you get the idea).

Smitten Kitchen

2009-01-09T17:46:00.000-05:00

I recently happened upon Smitten Kitchen and fell in love-- delicious recipes and beautiful food photos that make me hungry every time.

Today's almond-vanilla rice pudding recipe has left me with a craving.... I just might have to try my hand at this one over the weekend.

----
photo via SmittenKitchen.com

Ways to beat the bitter cold

2009-01-09T12:23:00.000-05:00

Hot beverages. Hot chocolate and loose tea are my preferences, and I'm trying my best to stick to just one cup of coffee a day...

Filling the house with warm friends and food (our plan for tomorrow evening)

Listening to the right winter music. My current winter playlist includes stuff from Hem, Bon Iver, Fleet Foxes, Allison Krause, Little Joy, Vienna Teng, Iron & Wine, The Weepies, The Winterpills, Nina Simone, The Kamikaze Hearts, and Carole King

Glowing light

Cooking and baking. Recent "sticks to the bones" meals we've made: baked ziti, chicken-pesto pizza, tacos, and we're still chowing down on leftover New Years Eve veggie chili

Cozy slippers that make you smile

Remembering warmer days

Finding some beauty in the rawness

Catching up on good TV. We're currently watching and loving Mad Men and It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

Cozy sweaters
Walks in the snow. We need to do more of this.

Projects

It's currently 7 degrees out there with the windchill, and the gusts are harsh. How do you stay warm, cozy, and happy in the midst of this deep freeze? And if you're in warmer climate... well, I'm sure you wish you had some bitter cold to battle, eh? No?

Foiled!

2009-01-07T16:38:00.002-05:00

Last night I got out all my yoga gear. I was READY!

Today: snow/ice/sleet/GROSS have shut down most of the Valley (although I put in a full day at the office-- living a mile from work is nice but it takes away any weather-related excuses). The yoga studio is closed, so my yoga plans aren't going to happen. It looks like I'll be firing up the ole Wii Fit tonight. Oh well, I tried. Here's hoping for better weather next time.

*photo: the view out my office window.

Namasté

2009-01-06T08:12:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow, I'm returning to yoga after oh, you know, four months away. I've found a nearby studio that offers vinyasa/flow, my preferred practice, at the perfect after-work time. The nearby part is key-- there are plenty of studios in the Pioneer Valley, and I was loving the power yoga classes at the Northampton Y, but it's just not going to work if I have to drive 20 minutes out of my way. Silly, but I know me. The cost of the closest place has been keeping me away, but I realized that my health insurance will reimburse me for a chunk, so it's time.

The real motivating factor: when I put on my go-to black work pants this morning they were snug all over. No surprise there, my diet has consisted of cookies and pie and eggnog for the past six weeks. But really, enough already.

----------
*photo from Flickr user Rodrigo Quiñones'

Winter break

2009-01-05T09:09:00.007-05:00

It was, in fact, loverly. Back to work today, refreshed, renewed, and ready.

Some photos from the past two weeks. Descriptions and more photos on my Flickr feed.

2008 Year End Survey

2009-01-04T22:41:00.010-05:00

Alright, here it is, my 2008 in review. It's hard to think back on an entire year, so I'm sure I'll have an addendum, but for now, I submit this. Tomorrow begins the first work week of 2009, and I'm feeling ready.
----
1. What did you do in 2008 that you'd never done before?
Got married! Went on a honeymoon! Traveled to California, swam in the Pacific Ocean, did a reading at both a wedding and a funeral, visited St. Louis, sold a car, went to Disneyland, planned a wedding (get ready for a marriage/wedding-themed survey). I'm sure there's more firsts.

2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year? If anything, I usually try to set goals rather than make resolutions. I have a few for this year, posted previously. I'm really not sure what mine were last year, so.... moving on.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth? Michele (yay, Maddy!), Pat's aunt (yay, Kylie!)-- I think that's it for '08?

4. Did anyone close to you die? That's the "ooph" question of the year. Yes. Ooma. Gram.

5. What countries did you visit? None, not even Canada this year (although we were very close to Mexico). Here's hoping this answer will change once we have a year of two consistent full-time incomes. Who's in for Sicily in 2010? Maybe a bike trip in 2009?

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008? More job satisfaction. More creative fulfillment. More time for travel (day trips and road trips included).

7. What date from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
the now traditional, loosely chronological list of memories... (thinking back on an entire year is a lot, and I know I'm going to miss some, so I reserve the right to come back and add to this list!)
Here goes: visiting Katie, Ryan and Janet in MD/DC; birthday weekend in boston-- girls weekend in a hotel room full of giggles, so much rain, random keg party and chance encounters with old friends, brooke's train hitting a skidoo, dress shopping, cupcakes; bike rides; the april weekend rich and jen visited; the boston museum of science with troop 500; trivia nights at the WWII club; the night we had dinner at eastside and talked more future talk and then saw young@heart; picking out wedding rings; The Submarines show; a few awful days in June and a few more awful days in July, including a particularly terrible car ride; the night before our wedding shower-- unbachelorette dinner, margaritas, Susie's patio, old friends, best friends; our wedding shower-- having our families (the women anyway) together for the first time, the very sweet party planned by very sweet hostesses, the assistance of our fantastic friends, how fun it was and not at all scary as expected; the drive-in during a thunderstorm, which made The Dark Knight even better; setting up our own photobooth and taking the pictures for our save the dates; Wilco at Tanglewood and sitting on top of some road gear with Julia soclose to the stage; the She & Him show at the Academy of Music; election night-- nerves, elation, running through the streets, hugging and screaming and all the horns honking; BBs Soup and Blues in STL and the great bands I saw there, Rich and Jen's wedding-- how happy they were, how beautiful everything was, the afterparty; watching the sunset in Carlsbad; picnicking on Mt. Tom; and of course the most memorable ever: our wedding day. (Apologies for the totally inconsistent use of capital letters- I did this in a few sittings.)

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? Successful wedding planning, more local friends, increased domestic competence (although that's still a work in progress), de-cluttering progress.

9. What was your biggest failure? Falling off the exercise wagon after the fall, spending too much time on the computer

10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Another healthy and injury-free year (knocking on wood)

11. What was the best thing you bought? Patrick's wedding ring.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration? My family, Patrick's family (which, of course, is my family now), Barack Obama

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? Sarah Palin, John McCain

14. Where did most of your money go? The wedding, student loans (that second one will be a part of my answer for the next 25 years)

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? Marrying Patrick, Barack Obama, Rich and Jen getting married, our stand mixer, seeing the Pacific Ocean, that baby giraffe at the San Diego Zoo

16. What music will always remind you of 2008? Ingrid Michaelson, the Juno soundtrack, Vienna Teng, various songs played at our wedding, Nick Drake, the Once soundtrack, the wedding gift mixes Julie made for us, 500 Miles, The Weakerthans, Matthew Loiacono, She & Him, the Submarines, the Judy Garland version of "Have yourself a merry little Christmas"

17. Compared to this time last year, you are: More settled, more aware of where I'm going, less busy.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of? Organizing, being on top of finances, exercising (some answers never change)

19. What do you wish you'd done less of? Driving to Albany, fretting about silly things, farting around online

20. How did you spend Christmas? We spent Christmas eve at dinner with my family (at Elaine and Doug's with Elaine, Doug, Brian, Jon, Annie, Bob whose singing tie went in the soup, another Brian, Mom, Dad, and Katie) and went to Christmas eve mass with Patrick's parents and Voa. We spent the night at my parents' house, did Christmas morning there, and then went to Patrick's parents' house for gifts and dinner. Dinner included Bob, Lura, Michael, Peter, Kirsten, Nathan (current cute things: "uh oh!", "bike", "guy", and a great belly laugh), and Norma. After dinner we went back to my parents' for chatting around the fire. We took lots of photos with the new lens for our camera. We anticipated a hard year-- in the past six months we've lost three people who were always a part of our Christmas celebrations. It was hard, especially at church, but being together made for a mostly warm and happy Christmas.

22. Did you fall in love in 2008? I fell deeper.

23. What was your favorite TV program? Lost, 30 Rock, The Office, Mad Men

24. What was the best book you read? Umm, Love in the Time of Cholera, The Poisonwood Bible, Everything Weddings on a Budget

25. What was your greatest musical discovery? She & Him, Fleet Foxes, Vienna Teng (none of this cutting-edge new, I know)

26. What did you want and get? Married to Pat! (Obvious theme of 2008).

27. What did you want and not get? I really can't think of a thing.

28. What was your favorite film of this year? I really didn't go to the movies much. Juno was up there (came out in Dec 07 but I saw it in 08). And I don't care what anyone else says, I really enjoyed Mama Mia, for its beauty and its musical numbers.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 27. I had to work so boo there. But I got a Wii! We went to dinner at the Northampton Brewery and then rushed home to play with my new toy. For my special Birthday dinner the following weekend we got dressed up and went to the Blue Heron, which was one of the most amazing meals I've ever had. Fantastic steak and wine, the courses stretched out over a few hours, romantic candlelight, it was wonderful.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? More time at the lake/sailing, a better handle on personal finances.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008? A better sense of my professional style (hello, sweater dresses!), a new love for tights, a continued interest in accessories, and ohgosh Etsy.

32. What kept you sane? Patrick, exercise when I did it, good music, good friends, a wonderful family.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most this year? Obama, of course.

34. What political issue stirred you the most? Answers that remain from past years: gay marriage (i hate that it's even political at all), voting rights/access/election integrity. New answers this year: The election! All of it. The panhandling ordinance in Northampton, stupid vs. brilliant solutions to environmental problems, access to affordable health care.

35. Who did you miss? The faraway friends I don't see often enough, the grandmothers we lost, the friends that drifted away.

36. Who was the best new person you met? It's hard to remember who I met this year. I'm pretty sure I met Becca and Nestor this year, and they're good people. Oh! And I just verified that I met Paul Carney January 2nd, 2008 so he counts. Becca, Nestor, and Paul. Final answer.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008:
Oh gosh. Well, in the biggest life events, it's the people surrounding you that matter most. Whether it's a loss or a celebration, the people around you make all the difference. That goes for the every day, too.
I learned that preparing for marriage is as important as planning the wedding.
I learned a few times over that sometimes you just have to let things go.

New Years Goals

2009-01-03T16:38:00.002-05:00

I'm not really one for New Years resolutions, but I find it's a good time for renewed commitments to goals already in progress.

Here they are, my 5 publishable, mostly in-progress, Goals as 2009 gets under way:

-Eat at the table more often than on the couch. We were doing really good at this for awhile and then fell off the wagon as various projects took over the table. Time to try again for meals at the table, with dinner music in the background and conversation in the foreground rather than TV front and center.

-Cook or bake a new recipe once a week. We've been working on cooking more, and since that's been going well I'm adding this goal in to the mix. Julia and Seth's Christmas gift to us was a subscription to Everyday Food, which will be a huge help in this goal. If you haven't seen this little magazine, check it out.

-Make exercise a regular part of my routine again. I was doing good up until the wedding, but since then I've been terribly inactive (and the scale proves it). The winter isn't so good for my regular favorites like biking and playing outside, but at the very least it's time to get back to yoga and weight training.

-Be more present at work. This is a constant struggle for me. My job is interesting and I enjoy it, but interpersonal issues often drag me down and leave me giving less than I should. I need to continue finding ways to feel more focused and invested, and to be involved with the community in which I work.

-Explore more. Lately I've been feeling a bit mired in the mundane. I love the cozy cocoon of our home, and it's often hard to leave, but I think just getting out and exploring our area more will help with the antsiness I've been feeling. I want to do more things like hiking the beautiful mountain range that's practically in our front yard, visiting nearby towns I haven't been to yet, going on photo expeditions, taking in more community events, checking out area parks, and just breaking out of the routine that is so easy to get settled into.

There's a traditional end of year survey I was doing for a number of years. I'm working on it and debating putting it up here. We'll see, it might be too boring or too personal or just too damn long.

p.s.

2009-01-02T23:24:00.002-05:00

(New post on the wedding blog. Not much more to say over there, but a few little updates and responses to comments.)

RIP Fred Knittle

2009-01-02T16:06:00.002-05:00

Have you seen the movie Young@Heart? If not, please do. It's a touching documentary about the Young At Heart chorus, a senior citizen chorus from Northampton that happens to sing rock and roll songs. The story of the group and its members is inspiring (and pretty funny, too).

I just read that Fred Knittle, a member of the chorus, died yesterday. Fred had one of the most memorable moments of the film, when he sang Coldplay's Fix You on stage at the Academy of Music. The song was supposed to be a duet with his friend Bob, but Bob passed away shortly before the show. Fred does the song solo, and it is one of the most heartfelt performances I've ever heard. I'm posting the clip of him singing Fix You below. Thanks for giving us this moment, Fred.

we'll take a cup of kindness yet

2008-12-30T13:46:00.006-05:00

We're just about to dash out the door with a Crock Pot full of vegetarian chili, a basket of corn muffins, and a case of beer, on our way to our friends' place for a New Years Eve celebration. The plan tonight is to hunker down against the blustery blizzard outside, eat hardy food, and let the good times flow.

This will be our 11th New Years Eve together, and we've spent every one with our friends. The groups have changed, but our style of ringing in the new year usually involves someone's living room, potluck-style eating, and a lot of laughing. I'm happy to keep up the tradition.

I sat down a few times today to reflect on 2008, and every time I tried to write something down it didn't come out right. 2008 was full of more ups and downs than any other year of my life, and it's hard to write about that without sounding gushy or trite or melodramatic.

So, 2008, we part bittersweetly. 2009, you are a great mystery, but we've got plenty of hopes and ideas to get you started.

Happy new year, friends!

---
*photo: New Years 2006, our self portrait.

May all your Christmases be bright

2008-12-25T23:21:00.001-05:00

under the tree
Originally uploaded by nicolemperle

11:11 PM Christmas night, sitting around the living room with Dad, sister, and husband. Fire is roaring, opened presents strewn around the tree, cookies and chocolates out on the coffee table.

It's been a good day. Hard at times-- the first Christmas without my grandmother and Patrick's grandmother. I think we all found ourselves in moments where we just really missed them. We muddled through those moments and enjoyed the togetherness (and a darn cute toddler to keep us all entertained). Lots of laughing, plenty of eating, all around warm and relaxed.

Our first married Christmas meant spending the whole holiday together- no more splitting up between houses or separate Christmas mornings. It meant two stockings for each of us (one at each house), and a new level of belonging. My favorite part was experiencing it all together.

Merry Christmas.

Bonus wedding video

2008-12-23T17:46:00.003-05:00

Dancin' with my dad on my wedding day
Originally uploaded by nicolemperle

We recently received a few little video snippets from our wedding, courtesy of our wonderful photographers. We didn't hire a videographer, so seeing these little bits as they trickle in is a lot of fun. I've posted a handful of the videos on Flickr. You can see them here.

This video is me dancing with my dad. My dad picked the song we danced to, and didn't tell me what it was beforehand (I had no idea until the moment it came on as we walked on to the dance floor). He chose "You are my Sunshine" (the Sara Gazarek version), which was the song he sang to me the day I was born- and has been singing to me ever since. I was surprised when the initial song came on, and then surprised again when the song faded into "My Girl". It was very sweet, despite my lack of coordination-- I'm glad I had these moments with my Daddy-o on such a whirlwind day (and his choice of songs was perfect).

Another reason to binge on holiday cookies

2008-12-17T16:08:00.007-05:00

I was up until 2:00 this morning attempting to put together a Blurb book of our wedding photos for our parents, who are chomping at the bit for actual physical copies of our photos and thus can't wait for the one that's coming from our photographers. We won't get the Blurb book in time for Christmas, but if I can manage to send it in tonight we might get it by the weekend after Christmas, which is acceptable, right?.

While Blurb's software is very user-friendly, the whole thing is taking for-ev-er. The high-res photos, plus a not-so-new computer have made the process painfully slow, which has made me grumpy.

I'm about to sit down for another many-many-hours of delight working on this thing, and I'm not stopping until it's done. Or until I'm rocking back and forth staring at the walls and muttering nonsensically.

----
Photo: one of our wedding photos by Upstate Photographers.

There/here

2008-12-14T19:50:00.003-05:00

It sounds like things continue to be rough in the Albany area, which was slammed with an ice storm Thursday night in to Friday morning. My parents are on day three with out power, and they've been told it won't be restored until Wednesday. There are lots of trees down around the house-- Dad spent the day today sawing limbs and trying to heat the house with the fireplace to prevent frozen pipes. They're staying with my aunt and uncle a few towns away until the electricity at their house comes back on.

Part of me is a little sad to miss the excitement, although I know it's not all fun and pioneer games. From what I've heard, many suburbs are experiencing a sense of community this weekend that they've maybe never had before. My mom spoke to more neighbors today than she has in the 12 years they've lived there. It's one of those 'good coming from bad' situations-- and Ice Storm '08 is sure to become the stuff of legends! I'm glad to be warm and ice-free in Western Mass, but I can't help but feel a little bit jealous when my parents share their tales of survival! (I can't help it-- I grew up reading The Boxcar Children and Little House on the Prairie!)

Meanwhile, we spent the weekend here getting into the Christmas spirit. Last night was Art Walk, dinner with friends, and a viewing of that holiday classic, Christmas Vacation. Today we baked loads of cookies and put up our Christmas tree (the first tree we've had since 2005-- our last apartment didn't allow real trees. Boo). It's just so nice to spend time in our own home.

(Photo by Patrick of our newly-hung lights. And that little guy isn't our actual tree-- just the little place holder.)

Slushed

2008-12-12T15:06:00.008-05:00

We did not get snow (sad), or ice (good) like our neighbors to the north, east, and west. The Valley seems to have sheltered us this time around, and we're just left with a lot of slush and mud. I'm glad we have power and clean roads, but I can't believe we haven't gotten any real snow yet. Update: Check out Ice Cream Diaries for some photos of the weather today in the rest of New England vs. the Pioneer Valley. (I'm on my way to stop in to Mt. Tom's for some eggnog ice cream to bring home. And I probably won't be able to resist the gingerbread or the Festivus ice cream, either.)

This weekend is the only one between Thanksgiving and Christmas that we'll spend at home. All the others have us driving to Albany for one thing or another. So far we've made plans to clean (desperately needed), bake (really want to), and shop (no other time to do it!). I'm also hoping to fit in some couch time and some crochet time. Did I mention the photo books I have to finish? Oh, and tomorrow is ArtWalk Easthampton. And Winterfest at Eastworks.

Weekends really need to be longer than two days.

p.s. Some new posts on the ole wedding blog. I received a few very sweet comments this week so I figured I'd finish writing about a couple things before fully moving away from Prom to Altar.

Urban Outfitters vs. Faces

2008-12-11T11:03:00.005-05:00

In case we needed another reason to support our locally-owned (and loved) Faces over the new Urban Outfitters on Main Street, Northampton-- Julia sent over this New York Magazine article about Urban Outfitters' pulling an 'I Support Same Sex Marriage' t-shirt from their shelves.

"Printed T-shirts are a staple item for Urban Outfitters, but in a rare move, the company yanked one from their California shelves last week. Tara Littman of Support Shirts designed the shirt in question, which features the statement "I Support Same Sex Marriage," clearly a hot-button item in the Proposition 8 state. Less than a week after it first arrived in stores and online, the shirt was gone."

The page linked to above links to some other articles on the same topic.

Something tells me Northampton won't like that attitude very much.

photo by me, the Faces window display last December.

Winter Song

2008-12-10T17:41:00.003-05:00

This video for 'Winter Song' by Ingrid Michaelson and Sara Bareilles is adorable. It's a beautiful song and the animation is both melancholy and sweet. I especially love the part where the girls go sledding.

(Fun fact: Ingrid is the friend/roommate of a high school friend. I'd adore her music either way, but the two-degrees thing is neat.)

A Pandora success story

2008-12-09T10:04:00.007-05:00

When I have the office to myself, I hop over to Pandora and let it pick some music for me based on artists I know I like. Over and over again, Vienna Teng comes up, and over and over I've loved what I heard. Her piano playing draws me in, her strong and beautiful voice steals my attention away from work and into her lyrics.

When I saw her on the Iron Horse schedule, I made plans with Patrick to see the show. That's where we were last night-- snuggled in to the Iron Horse with a couple hundred other people, sipping a pint of Steel Rail, mesmerized by the way Vienna played the piano. She built her set list out of requests shouted out by audience members, she told a story about each song, she poked fun at the uneven balance of slow songs over upbeat. Sitting inside that history-laden building surrounded by mellow and sweet music was the perfect way to spend an early December night.

Pandora led me (for free) to Vienna Teng's music. I spent money to see her live, and I will spend money to buy her albums. Artists who resist free access to their music should take note.

--
photo by Gordon Lai. It's not from last night but she was wearing that shirt. I'll update later with a photo I took at last night's show, if any of them came out at all...

Photo book recommendations?

2008-12-05T14:17:00.006-05:00

We took hundreds and hundreds (ok, thousands) of photos on our honeymoon in California. We're photo nuts anyway, but we also had a brand spankin' new camera to play with (plus two old ones that we used on the trip). That was two months ago and we haven't done much of anything with the photos-- hardly anyone has even seen them. We uploaded a couple, but it was a busy fall and we never did much more. I'd like to do a photo book before the holidays, so I need to get moving.

I made a photo book of our engagement photos using Shutterfly because we had a coupon and it was a good deal. The interface was ok and the quality was fine, but it wasn't customizable enough for me and I don't plan to use it again. I've heard rave reviews of Blurb books, but I'm wondering if there are any other companies I should look at. I'm not looking to spend a ton of money, but I want good quality and an easy but highly customizable layout process.

Suggestions?

Wreck Wreplica

2008-12-05T09:13:00.007-05:00

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, will someone please make us a cake replica ornament for Christmas? I suppose some people might not want to be reminded of their wedding cake wreck, but I think it would be excellent! Every disastrous detail must be replicated so that we can hang it on our tree and tell the tale of The Cake for years to come.

On a similar note, I loved Aviatrix's suggestion in her comment on my previous post: "For your tenth wedding anniversary you should bring the photo of the wreck to a bakery and try to get them to recreate THAT."

My plan was that for some big anniversary down the line we'd go all out on an amazingly gorgeous cake, but I think I like her idea better. A perfectly replicated crack, perfectly unfinished decoration, and cardboard showing in precisely the same way. It's a plan!

Ok, this is the last cake post, the ornament was just too good not to mention.

photo courtesy of Etsy seller GorgeousRedhead

Cake Wrecks-worthy?

2008-12-03T11:21:00.025-05:00

As you've probably heard, our wedding cake was, well, a disaster. I wrote about the whole thing here.

I've been trying to decide whether our cake was worthy of submission to Cake Wrecks, one of my favorite things on the world wide web these days. Obviously the structural issues alone do not warrant Cake Wreck fame, but compare the decoration on our cake to the cake photos we gave the baker for inspiration-- it just might be wreck-worthy.

Please consider these photos, sent to the baker and the idea behind the cake we wanted:

The idea behind the design was the alternating swirl-dot-swirl motif on the left, with the little frosting dots (seen in the cake on the right) along each tier. Simple.

Here's what we got:

Now beyond the obvious and heinous lopsidedness (due to the bottom layer collapsing entirely), please note the terribly blobby "dots" of frosting between the tiers. Here's one more, this time a nice close up (click on the photo to see it larger than life):

Those "dots" look an awful lot like mini marshmallows to me-- and they don't even continue around the entire cake! She just gave up. And yes, that's cardboard showing. A nice touch.

Wedding Wrecks were featured on Cake Wrecks today. Honestly, those cakes made me feel better about our charming little disaster. What do you think, was our wedding cake a certifiable cake wreck? I just might have to submit it to find out...

p.s. yes, after much back and forth, we got our money back.

Our town, all dressed up

2008-12-02T23:30:00.011-05:00

I left work yesterday tired and a bit frustrated. I just wanted to go home and hibernate. As I turned out of the parking lot and drove up the street in the heavy winter darkness, Easthampton stepped out from its dressing room and twirled around, modeling its new duds. Every tree along Cottage Street was strung with white lights. Wreathes hung along the lamp posts. The windows of the shops were decked (out). Easthampton looked festive and fine.

The thing that struck me was that all of it felt so genuine-- it didn't feel like a shopping mall or a movie set, it felt like a small town putting its best foot forward for its residents. The town didn't get all dolled up for commercial reasons (to trick people into spending money using olde time nostalgia), it did it out of pride and respect, because the residents deserve to see it sparkle for awhile. The town had brushed off its holiday best, it was sitting up straight and waiting to be noticed.

When we moved here from Northampton, a friend who lives a few blocks away welcomed us and said he loves Easthampton because it's "grittier, more real". And while I love Northampton, I know what he means. There aren't really any tourists to impress over here, not yet anyway. The town is here for the people who live and work and create here. That isn't always the best philosophy for business, but the genuine sentiment behind the holiday get-up is a nice change of pace.

Thank you Easthampton, for making me sit up straight and notice you. (I promise we'll do a photoshoot later in the week.)

(There are some thought-provoking posts on Easthampton floating around out there this week. Check out what Jim and Trace have to say.)

Gratitude

2008-12-02T10:08:00.020-05:00

My current career revolves around appreciation and gratitude. I spend my days expressing appreciation on behalf of my organization through correspondence, events, actions, and interactions. I'm sure my mom can't believe it, but I more or less get paid for writing/creating/acting out thank you notes of various forms.

So, last week, when thanking was all the rage, I started a list of things I'm thankful for in my own life. It's not a bad thing to do.

Right now, I am grateful for

the privilege of being married to an amazing person, whom I love fiercely. He challenges me, makes me laugh, teaches me, and loves me steadfastly (even when I drive him nuts). I'm also grateful that he's a really good hugger (the importance of good hugs to a successful relationship should be mentioned more often).
a loving family that I enjoy being around and isn't terribly far away.
marrying into a family that welcomed me (years ago) with open arms.
Calvin and his adorably awkward sleeping positions
new episodes of The Office and 30 Rock, watching them without commercials
being employed in a job that, for the most part, keeps me interested and makes me feel like I'm doing some good
the decision and ability to purchase our dream camera as a wedding gift to ourselves.
Burt's Bees Beeswax Lip Balm
far away friends who send letters and call just because.
the fact that we all got to experience Tina Fey as Sarah Palin
nearby friends who are always up for a night out or a night in
good coffee and favorite mugs that fit in my hand just right
pajama pants and cozy socks after work
shelves overflowing with books
hot beverages on cold nights (and gingersnaps on the side)
a view of Mount Tom; living and working in a beautiful place
tasty burgers and homemade ice cream within walking distance
giggling uncontrollably on the couch after dinner
a car CD player that works and rediscovered mix CDs of years ago.
Trader Joes' All Natural Peanut Butter (smooth, not crunchy)
my 'winter' playlist
NPR
the end of wedding planning (really. I'm so happy for our recently-engaged friends, and I loved our wedding, but I'm so very glad to be happily married and no longer planning a wedding! Like, I get giddy just thinking about the fact that we never have to plan another wedding.)
being able to talk to my sister during the day courtesy of Google chat (is that what it's called?)
President-elect Barack Obama

I could go on and on and on (more than I already have)-- what a lucky thing. I have a lot to be grateful for, which is worth remembering on the days when I moan about gray skies or the lack of a funds for a new wardrobe. It's really a very blessed life.

Moving in

2008-11-30T21:05:00.002-05:00

For more than a year, I've been blogging about the process of planning our wedding and getting married over at Prom to Altar. I'm glad I documented the process, and I met some great people along the way. Who knows, maybe I even wrote a couple things that helped others plan weddings with a grain of sanity.

Now that the wedding is over and I'm two months into the wonderful adventure of marriage, I've decided to keep writing but away from the world of wedding blogs.

While I don't have a specific agenda for this space, there are a few things about which I plan to spend some time writing. To name a few:

-Maintaining balance: responsibility and creativity, work and home, yin and yang.

-Budget living/eating/gifting/crafting, etc. (as newlyweds, as young folks with financial goals, as an often one-income household)

-Life in a small town during a not-so-hot economic situation

Other topics will crop up, and I'll do my best to keep things interesting. I just need to keep writing.

(Yes, I'm aware that a Blogger blog is a bit JV for the wife of a web developer. I'm not going to put him through making me a blog until I prove to both of us that I'm going to keep this up and not embarrass either of us in the process. Here goes!)